post-trip withdrawals
well i guess no trip would be complete without an update about the aftermath. except the trip to heaven that is.
well like i shared during the trip, and in some of the sharing sessions, the toughest part is when we're back in Singapore, with all its mundaneness, mountains of stress and homework and myopia.
the first night back in singapore was unbelievable. the reception at the airport, the food at hans, the clean floor at home.. the ability to just hit the bed and sleep immediately was a feeling.. that i havent experienced in a long time.
physically i definitely feel slightly stronger and my metabolism has taken a turn for the better. somehow i can just eat a lot again. something that i havent been able to do for quite some time haha. i hope i can by some miracle run my 2.4 faster too haha.
only after we're back then i realise how close we as a group have actually drawn to each other. but we must all realise that this group will not always be the same forever and we need to have firm rooting in none other than Christ. suddenly when i'm back in Singapore i feel the somewhat lack of need to study the bible and talk to God.. and i realise that it was through the group that i had gained much of my spiritual insight and been able to pull through the trip. because of this i shall make a commitment to memorise verses again.
guitar-wise.. well of course not practising properly for 10 days has taken quite a toll on my fingers. i do wish i still had the playing standards i had before the trip but i realise my sacrifice was to do God's work, so its okay that i dont play so well now. and because i realise that God holds his purpose for me in his hands, ya know, its okay if i dont play as well ever again.
homework-wise.. okay i've finished my 4000 word essay 1st draft (actually 2, if you count the mission trip report i blogged lol). but other than that it looks like i'm gonna get a few scoldings when i go back to sch. leaving for beijing on friday, then youth camp once i come back.. doesnt seem viable that i rush my philosophy essay and not do well. this is another area where i need guidance from God.
family-wise.. well my family really hasnt changed. my sis is well, still my sis, and my mom is already busy packing for beijing, for the whole family (i think i know where i got my compulsive organisational skills from, lol) (i dont intend to pack till thursday lol).
being back in Singapore, well, it is a familiar environment and all.. and it seems like its just too easy to slip back into life as if nothing happened. i know that i cannot hang on too tightly to the memories and people of this trip, if not i will never grow. my life is uniquely my own, and i know i can only live it, with God's help, through the stresses (and myopia) that urban living brings. and through my life God has a purpose for me.
so the challenge has begun. and i pray that God will guide me, and grant me strength with his presence and a spirit of humility.
Tuao Mission Immersion 2006
okay then, we're back from Tuao, and warning, MEGA post coming up, at 4600+ words, its longer than the extended essay i have to write for my school exam. pictures later.
When one is finally back from the mission trip at Tuao, one really doesn’t know where to start the report from. So I shall start by posting the statement I completed before I left for the trip.
“I am looking forward to this mission trip because I will have the opportunity to touch lives and share the gospel of Jesus.”
And let the report begin.
Day 1, 7/12/06
Woke up at 4:30am in the morning to meet at the airport at 5:30am. Well this was the first time for me at the budget terminal so was quite a new experience. The flight TR 502 left at 7:20 and we touched down at 11:30 at the Clark airport. A budget plane is smaller than a normal plane, and you have to pay for in flight meals. On the plane I was looking out of the window and watching the clouds, and it was really beautiful; one of the reasons I love to travel is because Singapore really lacks a lot of the nice scenery that is overseas. When I was on the plane I couldn’t help but think of Psalm 19:1 – 4.
Cleared the Philippines customs, which took quite long, you need a tag for every single bag you checked in. We then met Julius and Afren (how to spell?! Lol) at the airport with the vans they rented. They had sacrificed their time to drive down all the way from Baguio to come and pick us up. We went to a nearby shopping centre for lunch and I had the first taste of Filipino food which was a pork chop. We then met Shem who drove down in his Ford Escape and we set off for Ramon. The way Filipino drivers drive is truly remarkable. To be honest, I think our van had less than 100 horsepower. But with that tiny engine Julius was reving the engine to its limits just to overtake lorries and trucks that were 3 times as long as us. The roads in the Philippines were also very precarious, and most of the time there were usually only one lane in each direction, making overtaking even more dangerous. After a long journey and a few technical difficulties with one of the vans, we finally reached our destination at 9:45pm. We had dinner at Ramon COC and then checked into the Country Farm resort for the night.
Day 2, 8/12/06
We woke up early the next morning, and went to Ramon COC to present a few songs and to introduce ourselves. Uncle Winston shared a heartfelt devotion on Psalm 23, and many were visibly moved in our short time there. The hospitality of the brethren at Ramon was only foreshadowing what was to come at Tuao. We had breakfast at a school nearby, and I had the first taste of toilets in the Philippines, and I tell you a toilet seat is a luxury. So is a flush. I shan’t say more, but I’d tell you more later *wink*.
Following that we embarked on a four-hour journey to Tuao. We checked into the Cassily Resort at about 2pm, and left for the Tuao COC.
We then had our first taste of true Filipino culture in that we rode to church in Todos. A Todo is basically a motorbike with a carriage strapped on to it. Another thing about Tuao was the ‘long dusty roads’ that ran through the endless paddy fields. Well but you see when dust mixes with water what you get isn’t the best of roads. Which did make the hour long Todo ride to church all the more exciting. When journeying down the bumpy road and taking in the wonderful views of the padi fields, one can only stand in awe of God’s creation. The ride in the todos was also a once in a lifetime experience, with its one of a kind suspension system. Many a time the engine would stall and we would have to get out and push the todo out of the mud, but we all took it in good fun. One also realises the skill with which the drivers here drive with, as the ground was uneven and careful judgement was needed to find the best way to clear a bump. Yeah we did get stuck a couple of times, but the Todo me, Nehe, Alistair and Shawn rode didn’t break down on the way, hurray. We then met brother Jhun Ma and sister Babe at the church, and before we ate our lunch we sang a few songs. And what was really jarring to most of us was the power of the Filipino voices.
We had lunch at Tuao COC and had some activities with those present. Just before dinner we made visit to the family of Julie, a lady widowed by her husband who committed suicide. We pray that our visit to her and our sharing of a few songs have lifted their spirits in the household slightly. Brother Jhun Ma also gave us a those present a timely reminder that even though the family had lost their father, they, and all of us have our father in heaven. ‘Ask and it shall be given to you, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you’, matt 7:7 was another verse he shared.
Following that, we returned to the church where we had another presentation of songs, and an introduction of ourselves. The Filipino brethren also responded by singing a couple of songs for us, and also introducing the youths who attended the church. After dinner we journeyed back to Cassily (in a jeepney this time) where we had a devotion by Shawn.
Day 3, 9/12/06The highlight of the first half of the day was the immersion of ourselves in the locals’ lifestyle of rice planting. Once again, the muddy nature of Tuao became more evident to us, and the first step to getting dirty was the hardest for many of us. The mud came up high, almost halfway up the lower leg. Rice planting was really not easy. Here’s how the procedure goes. The rice seedlings are in bundles, and you take 5 – 10 seedlings in one bunch and using your fingers plunge then into the soil. Planting the seedlings and keeping them upright is one thing. Planting them in straight rows is another. And so is the speed, as we saw from the professional rice farmers.
Through this experience of rice planting we indeed saw how simple life was for the residents of Tuao, and also we experienced one of the first instances of generosity. The owner of the field must have great faith to sacrifice a plot of soil and seedlings to a group of complete strangers who could have damaged their crops and affected their harvest. Who knows, our seedlings could have very well just died the next day. Haha. Through this experience we all learnt humility, and how we should surrender ourselves and our pride to God.
Later in the afternoon we also built a canopy with bamboo outside the church. There were 6 steel bases that we filled with rocks to wedge the bamboo beams upright, and then create a series of beams to support the canvas for the roof of the canopy. Through this we really saw the power of God’s creation, as the bamboo beam could really hold a lot of weight. Following that we also began work on the signboards.
Later that evening we witnessed the baptisms of Vijay and another girl whose name I cannot remember at the Cassily resort swimming pool. Before that I was having a talk with Vijay atop the roof of the Jeepney and he was telling me quite a lot of things, translating words from English into Tagalog for me, and also telling me about life in the Philippines. In the Philippines people really get married really early, like in the 17 – 20 year old age group. And he was 16 and had a girlfriend already haha. It was really nice to see him get baptized that night too, and they celebrated the baptisms by.. going swimming in the pool!! Lol. I gave him a church camp t-shirt and a pair of shorts to change into after the baptism.
Day 4, 10/12/06Day 4 was Sunday at church, but the service was nothing like we know back in Singapore. We had the service under the canopy that we built the day before, and it started pouring. We first had a lesson by Irvin, then a sermon from Louis, with translation from Jhun Ma and Babe, and then a sharing for the communion by me. After church, me, Valmond, Alistair and Cheryl went to the Ragindin family to do a house bible study. Although we did four completely unrelated mini-lessons, we managed to find out more about the family, and one of the sisters there was a teacher, and we found out that even being a teacher in Tuao was not easy. She also had several children to attend to. Just before dinner we also visited the family of sister Sonya, who me and Nehe who were initially posted to couldn’t visit because it was raining and the house was too far. Kelvin’s lesson on Jesus calming the storm and our presence there moved sister Sonya to tears.
Day 5, 11/12/06
In the morning we went to the first elementary school to spend about an hour and a half doing some lessons with the children there. We did not have the full 3 hours we were initially allocated because the school was rushing their curriculum, but we made do with what we had.
In the afternoon me, Valmond, Charmaine, and sister Sharon went to the Julian family for a house bible study because we couldn’t carry on our project work as it was raining. It was only when I spoke to this family that I discovered the full extent of the hardship that some of the people in Tuao faced. The Julian family not only had problems with marriage, they also faced financial difficulties, a 51 year old lady in the family who fractured her wrist, and a bedridden grandmother who was losing her memory living in the house, as I found out later when I asked them for prayer requests. Just hearing the problems of the family just really ate away at my soul to the point which I could not sympathise with them, and I felt really terrible and ashamed, talking about problems I faced at school and studies when I shared Matt 6:25 – 34 on Do Not Worry. But I guess God has his ways and I do hope that our presence there has made a difference to the family. I also pray that the family pulls through this hard time with God’s help, because if they do pull through, they would have a really powerful testimony to share. Sister Sharon also shared a really appropriate song, Still. The words that ring in my head the most significantly are the words of the chorus ‘I will be still, know you are God’.
In the evening we had Bible study at the church, despite the small number of people gathered there, and Irvin shared a powerful lesson on sin.
That evening at Cassily was also quite a shocker for me, because Nehe discovered a long trail of red ants leading right through my room, into my luggage bag, to my cup of instant noodles with just a slightly broken seal. Which by the way was on our bed. After some initial panic we evacuated my luggage bag out of the room, but in the end Nehe had to sleep on the floor. Sorry Nehe!! Haha. That night I slept with quite a bit of insect repellent on myself, but thankfully the ants didn’t cross over to my side of the bed. An absolutely hilarious experience.
Day 6, 12/12/06
In the morning we went to the high school to do a session. Based on the feed back we received it was quite a good one, through the songs, skits and lessons. The feet washing was especially powerful, I think it even influenced the guy whose feet Irvin washed to come to the church for the campfire on the last night. At this point in the trip we also started to realize that right through the age groups the guys in Tuao seemed to be much more shy and reserved that the girls.
After that we had to rush off to the mayor’s birthday party. The mayor’s name was Mr Mambo *major laughing fit* (internal joke, lol). Even though the environment was that of drunkards, uncle Winston shared that he felt God had a purpose for us there, and that was why he decided to say a prayer before we sang the songs.
The late afternoon was spent doing project work, which was covering the mushy floor of the new church building with gravel. The procedure was to use shovels to pile up stones into these wooden boxes with four handles for two people, then to lift them up and empty them in the inside.
The evening bible study saw even less people show up for the bible study, and Joseph had an idea that we go down the street and knock on the doors of houses and invite them to go down to the church for Bible study. God answered my prayer that at least 1 person would come down because of our actions, and not only that several joined us for Valmond’s lesson on baptism.
That night uncle Winston shared with us that he observed hat the novelty of the trip was going away and that the through test of the trip was here, as the energy levels went down. However, I felt that my conservation of my introverted energy still helped me pull through many of the activities, even though I was not so active in conversation when we were riding in the jeepney. I feel that this is one of my strengths, that I am a person who is consistent, so I hope that was how I contributed to the team. The Chaperons also shared with us that although sometimes we do not realize it but everything we did touched peoples’ lives in one way or another.
Day 7, 13/12/06
Day 7 saw us going out to the elementary school in the morning. But before that I must share with you a truly hilarious experience that I had on a night I can’t really remember when but I think was on the morning of day 7. In the middle of the night I suddenly had the urge to go pangsai. So happened that when I was just about to finish, it blacked out. And I can tell you, the fear that overtakes you is truly overwhelming. I got out, went back to the room and fetched my torchlight, went back to the toilet and flushed it. But the moment I got back into bed the power came back on again. LOL. Anyway the water supply also ran out the next morning and it was really funny because I hadn’t bathed the night before as it was too cold, so I spent, yes, two days without bathing. Haha.
Anyway, the kids at the elementary school were rather noisy and there was no hall so we had to use a grass patch under the hot sun. This time we managed to cover the full ‘curriculum’ with them, including the songs, skit, story, and then later breaking up into different classes to conduct sessions with them. Shawn and I took a grade 4 class and we must say they were quite well behaved. We could really see them treasure the stuff we gave them, the markers, glue, scissors, and the craftwork. They meticulously coloured, cut and pasted the pieces of Joseph’s coat of many colours together. We then gave the prizes to the teacher to distribute for us, and taught them ‘With Christ in the Vessel’, which we had taught to so many other people before already.
In the afternoon we continued with the project work and fishing went fishing (I caught a fish, hurray!!), and then in the evening I gave my lesson on living a joyful Christian life to a slightly larger audience than before. I also asked uncle Edward and sister Sharon to share their experiences on living joyful Christian lives. Sharon’s testimony was that she was initially involved in the media industry but decided to take a break to do God’s work. Uncle Edward shared for quite long about his younger days and how his youth moulded his heart that he has now for poor people.
Following that me and Valmond proceeded to the house of the Ragindin family, the family who we first had a house Bible study with for the homestay, and we went there with Shawn, Andrea and Olivia who were going to brother Ernesto’s house for their homestay. If I’m not wrong one of the members of the Ragindin family was one of sister Mildred’s sisters. We then had supper which was chicken porridge made with native chicken and I decided to share a couple of verses about lamps and light, Matt 5 and Psalm 119:105, as they were using kerosene lamps as the electricity had not come back on yet.
That night me and Valmond didn’t sleep very well, because we trapped some mosquitoes under the mosquito net we had, and Valmond’s stick on repellant didn’t seem to work very well. Not to mention that I had to diarrhoea 3 times that night. Lol. But what I come to realize on the last day was that the Ragindin family had given all they could to us; the room that they gave up to us was actually their master bedroom. Which uncle Winston’s sharing lead me to draw the connection between their actions and the widow who gave her last two small copper coins in the Bible.
Day 8, 14/12/06
Even though I almost didn’t feel well enough to go for the mountain hike that morning I still decided to go anyway, and I didn’t regret going because the mountain hike was a truly unforgettable experience. For the climb up the mountain, well yeah we were used to treading in mud already, but muddy slopes are a different thing, haha. There were also several streams with rocks that we had to be careful to step firmly on in order not to injure ourselves. When we reached the peak of the mountain, we went to check out a waterfall, and I can tell you that it was truly beautiful. I just sat at the top of the waterfall and took it all in without talking much to anybody. Yeah I did try to take one or two photos of the waterfall but it looked uncannily 2D and what is a waterfall without the sound of flowing water. One of the thoughts I had in my heart was that when I would be ready to go and meet God, I would be able to stand alone in the presence of God’s creation, and sing I Stand in Awe with all my heart yet not have tears stream down my face. Then I would know I’m ready to be reunited with God in heaven. But that’s something I’m not able to do now.
We also witnessed the baptism of a sister Jovy at the pool near the waterfall, and she was moved to tears as well, as uncle Winston baptized her into Christ, in the natural and beautiful surroundings of God’s creation. How I wish my baptism were like that haha.
The trip down was equally tiring, but the view as breathtaking. The tall grass was quite sharp and gave us quite a bit of cuts, and the path pretty muddy too. My sandals probably carrying twice its actual weight on the way down because of the mud caked to it, and the grass that stuck to the mud. But how I wish we had more time to take in the view of the mountains from where we were. Forget Bukit Timah hill man.
It was then back to the Ragindin family for a shower and then back to the church for the campfire. Oh yes I forgot to mention that shower heads and piped water too, are a luxury. Chances are your bath will be out in the open, but me and Valmond were lucky that the Ragindin family had Comfort Room (CR, toilet) with a door (no lock btw) to bathe in. But I did get to bathe out in the open once because of a communication problem but never mind it was a good experience haha.
The turnout for the campfire that night was much larger than usual, and we gave the performance and skits our all. Shawn’s lesson was great, and the ‘Why me?’ skit was really powerful, so powerful that brother Jhun Ma was too choked up to give the invitation and Kelvin had to impromptu it. I really hope that during the campfire many hearts were touched, and that new people would be attracted by the church, to God. We then returned to our homestay families, and I gave a closing verse, 1 Thes 5:16 – 23 for the Ragindin family and gave the family a map of Singapore as a personal gift.
Day 9 15/12We woke up at 5:30am this morning (with crazy screams from Alistair over the walkie-talkie and amidst a leg cramp) to go down to church and bid farewell to the people there. And I can tell you, there was not a dry eye left, and I did keep my tears inside me either. The emotion was that of gratefulness for their hospitality, for how they gave of themselves to us like the woman with two mites, to show us how simple their lives were, and the song we sang ‘If We Never Meet Again’ really summed it all up, that even though we might never see each other again, we would see each other on that beautiful shore, of heaven. The feeling was really indescribable, and I will never forget the people I met there. Oh and just before I left the church, I decided to leave my black guitar behind, as after I looked at all they had given us, so much out of their poverty, my guitar didn’t really mean so much to me that I couldn’t give it away, and besides I couldn’t let them play on that cracked piece of wood with strings attached that couldn’t hold its tuning, that they called a guitar. Well I don’t know how long my guitar will stay without damage, but well that doesn’t really matter to me because every time I think of what they have done for us, everything else becomes so insignificant.
Taking in the scenery of Tuao from inside the Jeepney one last time, I could not help but feel that I would miss Tuao and especially the people there a whole lot. In the jeepney I said a silent prayer just thanking God for the whole experience and praying for all the people I came into contact with throughout the days we were there. We then made the long journey back to Manila where stayed at the luxurious Holiday Inn chalets, and ironically that was the only night that I had to use my sleeping bag with the floor, because there weren’t enough beds and I left my exercise mat back at the church. But it was okay because I told God that now that the important part of the trip was over he could let anything happen to me, including falling sick. That night we really had a heartfelt sharing and affirmations of each other, but only managed to get through halfway, and we retired to bed at 2:30am.
Day 10 16/12/06
This morning we continued with the affirmations and I shared my thoughts about the trip. So here it is.
Personality wise, I haven’t changed. I am still that quiet reserved boy who doesn’t really like change, and who doesn’t talk a lot. Preparation wise for this trip, I think its really amazing how I pulled through this trip, as it was really quite physically exhausting, especially that mountain climb which I estimate as more than 10km. Well you must understand that I didn’t do anything before the trip except for eat, sleep and play guitar. Mentally, I didn’t really have any expectations of what to expect on this trip, I just took whatever came. If we were going rice planting, fine. If there was a blackout, fine. If I had diarrhoea, fine. From what I see when I reflect, I was really, really riding on spiritual energy throughout the trip. To have survived with an average of six hours of sleep for more than a week is not something I do all the time, even during school term. The only thing I prepared for were the verses that I used in the sharing during the trip, and I think that really helped my spiritual growth even before we departed for the trip.
In terms of music, I’m still searching, and yes I think people generally cannot take long classical pieces. I think my standard of playing guitar has dropped drastically but it’s okay, I was doing God’s work throughout the trip. I’m still learning much about music, and I think I will not be able to answer what God’s true purpose for my music is until I die, so I will keep searching.
I will miss several things about Tuao. I will miss the beautiful scenery. Like what Kelvin shared, the parables of Jesus really come alive in Tuao, where we seem to go back in time to the times of Jesus. I will miss the beautiful never ending spans of rice fields, the blue skies, and of course the mountain scenery. Another thing I will miss is the concept of time in Tuao. In Singapore, I think we really place too much emphasis on time. A 45 minute journey to somewhere is really long to us. But in Tuao that’s how long we took to get to church each day. There is really no need to look at your watch when you’re there and that’s something I’d really miss because in Singapore we’re so couped up by schedules and deadlines and everything has to be so precise. But when I was in Tuao I just took whatever came my way, and my stress just disappeared.
This experience for me was different from other spiritual experiences in that it wasn’t a surreal emotional high experience. My emotional level generally remained relatively constant throughout the whole trip, and I would describe this trip as a very real experience, where the problems were real, and the people there were also so real. I will miss the people there, and I think the most important part of this mission trip was meeting the people. Brother Jhun Ma and Babe, who gave of themselves so selflessly, brothers Oscar and Ernesto who I talked to quite a bit, and their simple attitudes to life, and of course the Ragindin family who gave so much of themselves for us.
Throughout this trip I had been looking for a spark (uncle Winston preferred to call it glow) to keep with me after this trip, as what I know is that the greatest challenge I would face would be now when I’m back in Singapore and facing the challenges of schoolwork (I just found out I have 4 days to finish up the rest of my homework), the challenges of the people at school, the challenge of schoolwork, so much. And I was looking for this thing to keep with me when I came back to Singapore, and I think it all culminated on the last day when we were bidding our farewells to each other, that I understood that what I’d take back with me were the peoples attitudes towards life, that they had such great faith, that although sometimes they may not even have a profit during harvest time, and I look at myself and my dreams and my goals for success and I feel so ashamed. I have also learnt to take whatever comes my way, a step at a time, and I think that is how great things can be done. I also realize the power of scripture memory, as it really fills the mind with pure thoughts. What I have been doing all this while was to simply memorise book, chapter, verse but not the very words of life, and this is my resolve in continuing my Christian life. I know it will be hard to change some of the ways I see and view things, but I’m sure God will be with me in this.
Through the sharing that drew till this morning, I think all of us who went on this trip have been drastically changed for the better after this trip, and I know that this trip will be only a stepping stone for more to come, and so I close with the final statement:
‘I am blessed by this trip because of the warmth and hospitality of the people there, and the simplicity of their faith in God.’
