blog2

2008-01-08T15:22:00.000+08:00

hello.

well many things have happened over the past year or so, and i'm thankful to God for each of the things which did. as enlistment looms i guess it is time for a hiatus, until i can think of something better to do with a blog.

:)

2008-01-02T10:51:00.000+08:00

hello.

it currently feels like i'm at the crossroads of life now, waiting for results, waiting for NS. don't really know what to expect, but at least i've got stories from others who have gone through or are going through the army now :)

puchong mission trip was a fulfilling experience, managed to make a lot of friends and learnt quite a bit from it.

packing my closet now, never realised how much nonsense was in there. lol.

2007-12-14T13:56:00.000+08:00

hi. will be going away tml till next saturday for puchong mission trip.

as usual we dunno exactly what to expect, but with God's help i'm sure this trip will be a fantastic one :)

the tuao team has probably reached tuao by now too.

2007-11-26T23:54:00.000+08:00

was watching a documentary entitled 'my brilliant brain' (or something like that) on natgeo. it followed an eight year old pianist, who played beethoven's sonatina no. 1 when he was three, more cleanly than i can now. and oh yes he has perfect pitch (apparently 1 in 10000 people have it; well it does make me feel a bit more privileged :P) and can recognize tonality of chords. and yeah he's like playing high level concertos and chopin pieces.

well so the reason one of the researchers gave for some childrens' amazing ability with music is because they like it and are drawn into something like a trance when they play it. and heres the catch: they get better at it when they practice even more and want to learn it better (i just practice up to a point when i get angry/sian/when i feel like i'm not improving).

so the discussion goes on about whether it is nature or nurture, and the conclusion is never drawn, so i guess both have their part in creating a genius.

but my consolations are that if i were to live the life the little dude lives, i'd be practising 8h a day, and i wouldn't be able to connect that well to friends my age, and i wouldn't have the privilege of going through a normal schooling life. and even young prodigies face a challenge when they go through puberty/become an adult cos the thing about child prodigies is that it seems queer that a child is doing what adults can do, but when they grow older a lot more is demanded like critical interpretation and an individual style in order to keep their fame. and yeah mozart was one of those people, but he died at 35.

so in conclusion, life is fair. when i practice music, i think the most important thing is to enjoy myself, and not bother whether i can master the pieces to the extent the world class performers on youtube do. the documentary also found that if children started to receive brain stimulation in the form of creative learning and puzzles even before the age of 3, they would have an advantage in terms of intellect later in life. but i guess what is most important is that we recognize that God has given us different talents and use it for his glory.

2007-11-21T22:58:00.000+08:00

i've spent the last 2h cleaning up my table. the total amount of visible table is now the size of an A3 piece of paper, an achievement i must say. haha and this is the first time the compulsive disorder to clean the table kicked in so hard. luckily besides all the dust the only other gross stuff i encountered was three small spiders.

but it was quite sad, packing away all my old notes into a cardboard box. won't be studying academic subjects for at least the next two years. and i've got about a year to think of what course i want to study in uni.

but for now, just relaxation, and yes, more guitar.

2007-11-19T13:20:00.001+08:00

hello. my exams are now over!!!!

God has really been good to me, helping me through the music paper today despite me feeling really tired.

i've just opened the envelope of the scores i bought from the USA which arrived last week. yay got new songs to play.

2007-11-12T11:13:00.001+08:00

hello, its been some time, and in that time the ib exams have started and now 9 papers are over already.

the past eight days have been incredibly tiring, but i'm so glad the bulk of my papers is over. God has really been good to me, giving me papers that i can manage. now i have quite a reasonable amount of time to rest and study for math p3 on friday, and then music next monday.

woohoo.

333rd post :)

2007-09-21T13:43:00.000+08:00

and yes, prelims are finally over!!

and even though i was feeling absolutely down and drained over the past week, even though i slept for only 6.5h last night i feel rather glad and relieved that its over.

and yes another one of our church members has left for studies overseas. indeed we often take our friends for granted until they leave, and things just quite arent the same when they're overseas.

yeap so thats about it. going to enjoy my 5 day break :P

hoo hah prelims is in 2 days

2007-09-08T16:50:00.000+08:00

and i'm not studying anymore.

for this weekend at least.

2007-08-18T15:25:00.001+08:00

i caught a snippet of pokemon the cartoon this morning, and they're like into their number who knows what season already.

and even though its been about 4 or 5 years since i stopped watching kids central (yes if you do the maths, its a bit wrong but hey), pokemon still evokes the same feelings as it did when i was just a kid haha. and then it struck me why pokemon is so successful as a show.

yes you may scoff at the characters and that oh so corny storyline of conflict (team rocket appears) and resolution (pikachu zaps team rocket into oblivion), but one thing that struck me the most is the character ash. his goal? 'to catch 'em all', hence his surname Ketchum hurhur. but jokes aside, ash has the basic ambition to be the best, an ambition which is ingrained into many people in society. his actions resonate the rashness of decision making we sometimes have in life, and he does have his failures too, but ultimately he comes up tops. and because of this i feel he appeals to so many, and i see a little reflection of myself in him, too. after all, the first two lines in the very very first opening theme were 'I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was'
and speaking of the power of cartoons, i was learning 'a whole new world' on guitar and i started thinking about the storyline of aladdin, which indeed encapsulates the word 'fantasy'. finding a genie who grants you 3 wishes, picking up a princess and living happily ever after. and not to mention the magic carpet that flies. if only finding romance in reality were that simple haha.

k thats all for now cya.

2007-08-07T21:02:00.000+08:00

Eccl 4:4: 'And I saw that all labour and all achievement spring from man's envy of his neighbour. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.'

hmm God wasnt joking when he made Solomon the wisest man who ever lived.

ndp hol coming soon. haha i like holidays.

2007-07-07T19:45:00.000+08:00

hello, i am back here to announce that: my mid year exams are over!!!

and that leaves 9 weeks to prelims.

right but yesterday i had a smashing time.. cos of the sheer relief of having the worst exam in my life over. the maths teachers decided to give us an easy paper.. so that we could watch transformers in peace.

FINALLY got to watch transformers.. went with a few of my sch friends. its a really really cool movie, the graphics are stunning. too bad they didnt develop the transformers characters better. and they keep on focusing back to the humans in the middle of fight scenes. boo. but anyways its one of the best movies i've ever watched.

then had care team.. where there were more girls than guys!! haha. was quite funny as usual.

alright thats all for now. cya.

2007-06-28T12:48:00.000+08:00

and while transformers opens today, studying shall continue till i am free on the 6th of july to watch the movie. :(

life didn't have very good things to say about the movie though. we'll see. no spoiling pls.

and after tml's EL P2 and Maths P1 i'll be 2 1/2 done.

2007-06-23T22:12:00.000+08:00

anddd..

as the last moments of the holidays fade away, i have decided that... i will not study for the last hours before school reopens. =)

at least this hols will be the last (well ok lah 2nd last) hols that arent really a hols. but ah well when we all start working the term 'TGIF' would never be stronger.

today was reading wikipedia about transformers (yes not the physics one). and found out that the storyline is very convoluted indeed. i didnt really follow the transformers tv series, but the one i watched during my time was beast wars.. the most coherent of all the hybrids. and so i'm looking forward to transformers the film when my exams end in two weeks time (even though it opens officially on 28th june -.-)

alright then. i'm off for more slacking. cya

2007-06-20T10:25:00.000+08:00

'Rural areas are surrounded by God's handiwork, continually reminded of what He has done. Maybe this is why faith is more common in rural areas.' Faith that God will provide for the crops that they grow, for the families they raise. Well they seem to have less than us, but I guess they don't have as much reason to worry so much about the tomorrow as us. God holds the weather and their livelihoods in his hands. We have much to learn from them.

'In urban areas it is human ingenuity that is constantly on display. Maybe this is why faith is less common, and despair more common, in the city...

2007-06-09T19:04:00.000+08:00

back from church camp!!

a very very belated happy birthday to chia lynn!! haha i was going to blog on the 5th but forgot to. :P

2007-05-24T20:19:00.000+08:00

last day of sch tomorrow!! :)))))))))))))))))))))))

2007-05-12T22:29:00.000+08:00

church camp is coming in slightly under 4 weeks :))

june holidays would be spent studying.. but thats life.

2007-04-27T22:18:00.001+08:00

it feels good to go home on time on tuesdays and thursdays now that syf is over.

it really does.

2007-04-16T18:11:00.000+08:00

today i passed my 2.4 with a D for the first time!! woohoo.

that means i evade early enlistement (with a bit of help from the pe teacher for pullups, haha) but that also means i need to train to keep myself fit, if i go in with the state of fitness i am in now sure hardbase. my 2.4 timing also not say very fast, my physics teacher says that running is very important in army.

syf is in 3 days. and then i'd be free haha.

2007-04-04T18:37:00.000+08:00

hello!! my concert's finally over.

and for you who've missed it, someone who was in the audience filmed my solos on her handphone camera and kindly put it up on youtube :))

heres a link to one of the videos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMZn7qKKQR0
the rest is linked on the right hand side of the page.

and now its almost back to normal life, albeit the stack of homework i've piled up cos of concert preparation haha. sometimes it really makes me wonder what the goal of our lives seems to be in this time of schooling and not really having much time for yourself. but i guess its all part of God's ultimate plan for us.. to shape us and to mould us, but of course easier said than to really believe it haha.

ok then thats all for now. i'll update more when i have time, cya.

2007-03-19T12:25:00.000+08:00

hey all.

so here i am sitting in front of my computer on the first day of school feeling all sick and terrible.. which isnt much of a surprise given the little time i had to rest during the hols. a guitar camp, a day out to meet the cyclists and also help my guitar teacher judge a competition, kelvin's wedding..

and not to mention the crazy weather fluctuations and my sister sneezing and coughing everywhere.

well then so theres only so much my body can take. my schedule is simply too packed already. i cant wait for the guitar concert and syf to be over.. then i'd have a break.

pls come for concert.. its on 31st march, sat, 730pm. and best of all its free.

school is kind of getting the better of me, and i find that sometimes im simply so busy that i dont really have time to reflect on God's work for me.. and the influence at school sometimes just isnt the best. well so i guess i'd just have to keep on striving to maintain my daily walk with God, no matter how much stress.

but i wont mind cutting out some of the stuff from my schedule so i'd have more time for myself. haha.

2007-02-26T21:47:00.000+08:00

hey!!

today i finally got my guitar results back, and woohoo i passed!! 4 marks short of a distinction but never mind haha.

but really, between the time when my guitar teacher smsed me at 730pm to 9pm when he came, the anxiety was terrible haha. plus before he came i found out that two of my friends didn't pass and one of my classmates got distinction. for piano. so i was kind of expecting a fail grade.. after all wouldn't my guitar teacher call me immediately when he collected the results?

before my guitar teacher came i was reading the new devotion book that i found, and this week's topic is on 'one source of significance'. our worldly achievements really do not make us any more significant in God's eyes. it is because we are children of God that we are significant.

to be honest, i cant really say that i'm ecstatic that i passed, more of relieved. yes my heart longs for higher marks. such is human desire.. unsatisfyable haha.

yes i thank God for helping me through the period before my exam and for answering my prayers, but thats the problem with earthly achievements sometimes, that we work hard, and at the end we say that our achievements is because of our work. it becomes hard to see where God comes into the picture.

yet when we fail, we usually go back to God at the end of it, as, like the book puts it, failure is part of teh human condition. and it really points to the fact that we are significant simply because we are God's children.

kk gdnite!!

2007-02-25T18:50:00.000+08:00

today i saw what Christianity really is.

it's not when people go to church on sunday, all smiling and dandy..

it's not when people get highs during youth camps and activities, and appear to stay that way throughout the schooling week.

it's about the joy of going through trials of many kinds, no matter how hard they are. because it develops perseverance.

2007-02-20T20:22:00.000+08:00

after today i've discovered that my house can be a very fun place to live in for a kid.

although a bit dangerous. haha.

6th birthday

2007-02-14T20:15:00.000+08:00

after all the hustle and bustle of valentine's day at sch.. i've somehow forgotten that today i turn a year older.. that makes me 6 years old as a Christian.

:)

2007-01-31T21:33:00.000+08:00

there are some things i want for my birthday that money cant buy and people cant give to me.

but for everything else theres friends :)

thanks for today.

2007-01-23T20:20:00.000+08:00

it's at times like this when trials come in all shapes and sizes that u realise that nothing in your life really belongs to you. your harddrive with all your important projects could crash. an accident could just be waiting around the corner.

or some hairdresser lurking round the corner doesnt really get you when you say 'BU YAO TAI DUAN.'

i am never going back to clementi to cut my hair again.

any recommendations? lol.

2007-01-16T21:26:00.000+08:00

Happiness Keeps You Sweet,

Trials Keep You Strong,

Sorrows Keep You Human,

Failures Keep You Humble,

Success Keeps You Glowing,

But Only God Keeps You Going!

i dunno.. but when i read this in the email by sister babes tears just came to my eyes again.. maybe its just because i'm really exhausted again, but i realise how impactful our connection with the people in tuao is.

well i guess when people of such different cultures come together for a short period of emotional high, God really grants us a taste of heaven. yes we do see some areas we envy each other for, our ways of life have their own good points, but also bring with it struggles and challenges that all shape us for eternity.

its really remarkable how God just pulls me up at the moments i feel most in the pits. perhaps this is when i grow the most.

chinese results

2007-01-08T19:08:00.000+08:00

well school i must say has been really exhausting and the first few days have left me really drained, with many assignments still on the 'to-do' list.

but i thank God for my chinese results i got back today. i managed to obtain the highest possible grade, which is 7 points for the exam. yes, 255 out of the 271 who took the exam got 7 points too, and the standard of the chinese language wasnt that high, but i really thank God for my grade because it is kind of like a triumph for me. this is the first time 1 john 5:14 - 15 came alive an incident; uncle winston quoted this verse for me on the last night of the mission trip during the affirmations. i did not really take the verse to heart back then, but i memorised it anyway and i really see how powerful it is now.

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything
according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we
ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.

before the exam i was praying to God to help me through this exam, and he really did pull me through. right before the release of the results i told myself that whatever grade i got, i would say a prayer immediately to God, through the noise, through the shouts of joy. and now i really feel that i really dont owe my achievement entirely to myself, but that God's hand was firm in guiding me.

schools getting tougher, my body, mind, and emotional level is getting weaker, but it's comforting to know that God knows my weaknesses, and that one day they will all be stripped away.

first post of the year

2007-01-01T15:25:00.000+08:00

This is an email that uncle patrick sent to me on new year's day, and i think it was quite appropriate that i post it here:

Isaiah 52:12

Security from Yesterday.
"God requireth that which is past." At the end of the year we turn with eagerness to all that God has for the future, and yet anxiety is apt to arise from remembering the yesterdays. Our present enjoyment of God's grace is apt to be checked by the memory of yesterday's sins and blunders. But God is the God of our yesterdays, and He allows the memory of them in order to turn the past into a ministry of spiritual culture for the future. God reminds us of the past lest we get into a shallow security in the present.

Security for To-morrow.
"For the Lord will go before you." This is a gracious revelation, that God will garrison where we have failed to. He will watch lest things trip us up again into like failure, as they assuredly would do if He were not our rereward. God's hand reaches back to the past and makes a clearing-house for conscience.

Security for To-day.
"For ye shall not go out with haste." As we go forth into the coming year, let it not be in the haste of impetuous, unremembering delight, nor with the flight of impulsive thoughtlessness, but with the patient power of knowing that the God of Israel will go before us. Our yesterdays present irreparable things to us; it is true that we have lost opportunities which will never return, but God can transform this destructive anxiety into a constructive thoughtfulness for the future. Let the past sleep, but let it sleep on the bosom of Christ.

Leave the Irreparable Past in His hands, and step out into the Irresistible Future with Him.

Chambers, Oswald (1963). My Utmost for His Highest. Michigan: Discovery House, p. 366.

well i know that the new year will be exciting and all, but i'm not exactly ready to spring into it, one of the reasons being that looking back on the past year, i can just sense the trials and problems that lie ahead, most eminent now the one of unfinished homework. but i'll let the panic attack start on wednesday haha.

2006 has been a great year for the youth, but what i see lies ahead is a great challenge for us. with kelvin handing down his responsibility as our long time youth leader down to a younger group, comes many uncertainties, which do need a lot of prayer. new arrangements for youth class.. great visions, but carrying them out is also a challenge.

so well i'm just going to spend the last 2 days where the concept of strict time is not present resting and recovering, and bracing myself.

cya.

To Catch a Glimpse of God

2006-12-21T23:43:00.000+08:00

Verse 1:
Oh Lord, we thank you,
For the hearts that are touched in this place
And Lord we thank you
For a chance to have this taste

Pre Chorus 1:
Of this piece of heaven
Though our hearts are laden
For this time we’re given
To run this race

Chorus:
Lord we give you our pride
The walls of our heart
Draw us near to your side
Like the widow, her two coins
Out of her poverty
Lord we ask for humility

Verse 2:
Oh Lord we thank you
For the joy we have each day
And Lord we ask you
To hear what we have to say

Pre Chorus 2:
Of this hope of heaven
Though our hearts are laden
For this time we’re given
To see your face

Chorus

Bridge:
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
A broken and contrite heart (x2)
Our sacrifices, Lord, are a broken spirit
A broken, contrite heart

Chorus

2006-12-21T12:31:00.000+08:00

well then, i'm going away again.

its off to beijing for the next 4 days, and i've more or less kissed any chance of finishing my homework goodbye. maybe i'll try to write my 1.6k word philosophy essay on the plane.

maybe.

then theres youth camp!! i really hope to attend the full camp, but i have to be prepared if i need to be called back for guitar practice :(

yeap so its goodbye. for now.

post-trip withdrawals

2006-12-19T22:56:00.000+08:00

well i guess no trip would be complete without an update about the aftermath. except the trip to heaven that is.

well like i shared during the trip, and in some of the sharing sessions, the toughest part is when we're back in Singapore, with all its mundaneness, mountains of stress and homework and myopia.

the first night back in singapore was unbelievable. the reception at the airport, the food at hans, the clean floor at home.. the ability to just hit the bed and sleep immediately was a feeling.. that i havent experienced in a long time.

physically i definitely feel slightly stronger and my metabolism has taken a turn for the better. somehow i can just eat a lot again. something that i havent been able to do for quite some time haha. i hope i can by some miracle run my 2.4 faster too haha.

only after we're back then i realise how close we as a group have actually drawn to each other. but we must all realise that this group will not always be the same forever and we need to have firm rooting in none other than Christ. suddenly when i'm back in Singapore i feel the somewhat lack of need to study the bible and talk to God.. and i realise that it was through the group that i had gained much of my spiritual insight and been able to pull through the trip. because of this i shall make a commitment to memorise verses again.

guitar-wise.. well of course not practising properly for 10 days has taken quite a toll on my fingers. i do wish i still had the playing standards i had before the trip but i realise my sacrifice was to do God's work, so its okay that i dont play so well now. and because i realise that God holds his purpose for me in his hands, ya know, its okay if i dont play as well ever again.

homework-wise.. okay i've finished my 4000 word essay 1st draft (actually 2, if you count the mission trip report i blogged lol). but other than that it looks like i'm gonna get a few scoldings when i go back to sch. leaving for beijing on friday, then youth camp once i come back.. doesnt seem viable that i rush my philosophy essay and not do well. this is another area where i need guidance from God.

family-wise.. well my family really hasnt changed. my sis is well, still my sis, and my mom is already busy packing for beijing, for the whole family (i think i know where i got my compulsive organisational skills from, lol) (i dont intend to pack till thursday lol).

being back in Singapore, well, it is a familiar environment and all.. and it seems like its just too easy to slip back into life as if nothing happened. i know that i cannot hang on too tightly to the memories and people of this trip, if not i will never grow. my life is uniquely my own, and i know i can only live it, with God's help, through the stresses (and myopia) that urban living brings. and through my life God has a purpose for me.

so the challenge has begun. and i pray that God will guide me, and grant me strength with his presence and a spirit of humility.

2006-12-18T21:39:00.000+08:00

Tuao Mission Immersion 2006

2006-12-18T00:23:00.000+08:00

okay then, we're back from Tuao, and warning, MEGA post coming up, at 4600+ words, its longer than the extended essay i have to write for my school exam. pictures later.

When one is finally back from the mission trip at Tuao, one really doesn’t know where to start the report from. So I shall start by posting the statement I completed before I left for the trip.

“I am looking forward to this mission trip because I will have the opportunity to touch lives and share the gospel of Jesus.”

And let the report begin.

Day 1, 7/12/06
Woke up at 4:30am in the morning to meet at the airport at 5:30am. Well this was the first time for me at the budget terminal so was quite a new experience. The flight TR 502 left at 7:20 and we touched down at 11:30 at the Clark airport. A budget plane is smaller than a normal plane, and you have to pay for in flight meals. On the plane I was looking out of the window and watching the clouds, and it was really beautiful; one of the reasons I love to travel is because Singapore really lacks a lot of the nice scenery that is overseas. When I was on the plane I couldn’t help but think of Psalm 19:1 – 4.

Cleared the Philippines customs, which took quite long, you need a tag for every single bag you checked in. We then met Julius and Afren (how to spell?! Lol) at the airport with the vans they rented. They had sacrificed their time to drive down all the way from Baguio to come and pick us up. We went to a nearby shopping centre for lunch and I had the first taste of Filipino food which was a pork chop. We then met Shem who drove down in his Ford Escape and we set off for Ramon. The way Filipino drivers drive is truly remarkable. To be honest, I think our van had less than 100 horsepower. But with that tiny engine Julius was reving the engine to its limits just to overtake lorries and trucks that were 3 times as long as us. The roads in the Philippines were also very precarious, and most of the time there were usually only one lane in each direction, making overtaking even more dangerous. After a long journey and a few technical difficulties with one of the vans, we finally reached our destination at 9:45pm. We had dinner at Ramon COC and then checked into the Country Farm resort for the night.

Day 2, 8/12/06
We woke up early the next morning, and went to Ramon COC to present a few songs and to introduce ourselves. Uncle Winston shared a heartfelt devotion on Psalm 23, and many were visibly moved in our short time there. The hospitality of the brethren at Ramon was only foreshadowing what was to come at Tuao. We had breakfast at a school nearby, and I had the first taste of toilets in the Philippines, and I tell you a toilet seat is a luxury. So is a flush. I shan’t say more, but I’d tell you more later *wink*.

Following that we embarked on a four-hour journey to Tuao. We checked into the Cassily Resort at about 2pm, and left for the Tuao COC.

We then had our first taste of true Filipino culture in that we rode to church in Todos. A Todo is basically a motorbike with a carriage strapped on to it. Another thing about Tuao was the ‘long dusty roads’ that ran through the endless paddy fields. Well but you see when dust mixes with water what you get isn’t the best of roads. Which did make the hour long Todo ride to church all the more exciting. When journeying down the bumpy road and taking in the wonderful views of the padi fields, one can only stand in awe of God’s creation. The ride in the todos was also a once in a lifetime experience, with its one of a kind suspension system. Many a time the engine would stall and we would have to get out and push the todo out of the mud, but we all took it in good fun. One also realises the skill with which the drivers here drive with, as the ground was uneven and careful judgement was needed to find the best way to clear a bump. Yeah we did get stuck a couple of times, but the Todo me, Nehe, Alistair and Shawn rode didn’t break down on the way, hurray. We then met brother Jhun Ma and sister Babe at the church, and before we ate our lunch we sang a few songs. And what was really jarring to most of us was the power of the Filipino voices.

We had lunch at Tuao COC and had some activities with those present. Just before dinner we made visit to the family of Julie, a lady widowed by her husband who committed suicide. We pray that our visit to her and our sharing of a few songs have lifted their spirits in the household slightly. Brother Jhun Ma also gave us a those present a timely reminder that even though the family had lost their father, they, and all of us have our father in heaven. ‘Ask and it shall be given to you, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you’, matt 7:7 was another verse he shared.

Following that, we returned to the church where we had another presentation of songs, and an introduction of ourselves. The Filipino brethren also responded by singing a couple of songs for us, and also introducing the youths who attended the church. After dinner we journeyed back to Cassily (in a jeepney this time) where we had a devotion by Shawn.

Day 3, 9/12/06
The highlight of the first half of the day was the immersion of ourselves in the locals’ lifestyle of rice planting. Once again, the muddy nature of Tuao became more evident to us, and the first step to getting dirty was the hardest for many of us. The mud came up high, almost halfway up the lower leg. Rice planting was really not easy. Here’s how the procedure goes. The rice seedlings are in bundles, and you take 5 – 10 seedlings in one bunch and using your fingers plunge then into the soil. Planting the seedlings and keeping them upright is one thing. Planting them in straight rows is another. And so is the speed, as we saw from the professional rice farmers.

Through this experience of rice planting we indeed saw how simple life was for the residents of Tuao, and also we experienced one of the first instances of generosity. The owner of the field must have great faith to sacrifice a plot of soil and seedlings to a group of complete strangers who could have damaged their crops and affected their harvest. Who knows, our seedlings could have very well just died the next day. Haha. Through this experience we all learnt humility, and how we should surrender ourselves and our pride to God.

Later in the afternoon we also built a canopy with bamboo outside the church. There were 6 steel bases that we filled with rocks to wedge the bamboo beams upright, and then create a series of beams to support the canvas for the roof of the canopy. Through this we really saw the power of God’s creation, as the bamboo beam could really hold a lot of weight. Following that we also began work on the signboards.

Later that evening we witnessed the baptisms of Vijay and another girl whose name I cannot remember at the Cassily resort swimming pool. Before that I was having a talk with Vijay atop the roof of the Jeepney and he was telling me quite a lot of things, translating words from English into Tagalog for me, and also telling me about life in the Philippines. In the Philippines people really get married really early, like in the 17 – 20 year old age group. And he was 16 and had a girlfriend already haha. It was really nice to see him get baptized that night too, and they celebrated the baptisms by.. going swimming in the pool!! Lol. I gave him a church camp t-shirt and a pair of shorts to change into after the baptism.

Day 4, 10/12/06
Day 4 was Sunday at church, but the service was nothing like we know back in Singapore. We had the service under the canopy that we built the day before, and it started pouring. We first had a lesson by Irvin, then a sermon from Louis, with translation from Jhun Ma and Babe, and then a sharing for the communion by me. After church, me, Valmond, Alistair and Cheryl went to the Ragindin family to do a house bible study. Although we did four completely unrelated mini-lessons, we managed to find out more about the family, and one of the sisters there was a teacher, and we found out that even being a teacher in Tuao was not easy. She also had several children to attend to. Just before dinner we also visited the family of sister Sonya, who me and Nehe who were initially posted to couldn’t visit because it was raining and the house was too far. Kelvin’s lesson on Jesus calming the storm and our presence there moved sister Sonya to tears.

Day 5, 11/12/06
In the morning we went to the first elementary school to spend about an hour and a half doing some lessons with the children there. We did not have the full 3 hours we were initially allocated because the school was rushing their curriculum, but we made do with what we had.

In the afternoon me, Valmond, Charmaine, and sister Sharon went to the Julian family for a house bible study because we couldn’t carry on our project work as it was raining. It was only when I spoke to this family that I discovered the full extent of the hardship that some of the people in Tuao faced. The Julian family not only had problems with marriage, they also faced financial difficulties, a 51 year old lady in the family who fractured her wrist, and a bedridden grandmother who was losing her memory living in the house, as I found out later when I asked them for prayer requests. Just hearing the problems of the family just really ate away at my soul to the point which I could not sympathise with them, and I felt really terrible and ashamed, talking about problems I faced at school and studies when I shared Matt 6:25 – 34 on Do Not Worry. But I guess God has his ways and I do hope that our presence there has made a difference to the family. I also pray that the family pulls through this hard time with God’s help, because if they do pull through, they would have a really powerful testimony to share. Sister Sharon also shared a really appropriate song, Still. The words that ring in my head the most significantly are the words of the chorus ‘I will be still, know you are God’.

In the evening we had Bible study at the church, despite the small number of people gathered there, and Irvin shared a powerful lesson on sin.

That evening at Cassily was also quite a shocker for me, because Nehe discovered a long trail of red ants leading right through my room, into my luggage bag, to my cup of instant noodles with just a slightly broken seal. Which by the way was on our bed. After some initial panic we evacuated my luggage bag out of the room, but in the end Nehe had to sleep on the floor. Sorry Nehe!! Haha. That night I slept with quite a bit of insect repellent on myself, but thankfully the ants didn’t cross over to my side of the bed. An absolutely hilarious experience.

Day 6, 12/12/06
In the morning we went to the high school to do a session. Based on the feed back we received it was quite a good one, through the songs, skits and lessons. The feet washing was especially powerful, I think it even influenced the guy whose feet Irvin washed to come to the church for the campfire on the last night. At this point in the trip we also started to realize that right through the age groups the guys in Tuao seemed to be much more shy and reserved that the girls.

After that we had to rush off to the mayor’s birthday party. The mayor’s name was Mr Mambo *major laughing fit* (internal joke, lol). Even though the environment was that of drunkards, uncle Winston shared that he felt God had a purpose for us there, and that was why he decided to say a prayer before we sang the songs.

The late afternoon was spent doing project work, which was covering the mushy floor of the new church building with gravel. The procedure was to use shovels to pile up stones into these wooden boxes with four handles for two people, then to lift them up and empty them in the inside.

The evening bible study saw even less people show up for the bible study, and Joseph had an idea that we go down the street and knock on the doors of houses and invite them to go down to the church for Bible study. God answered my prayer that at least 1 person would come down because of our actions, and not only that several joined us for Valmond’s lesson on baptism.

That night uncle Winston shared with us that he observed hat the novelty of the trip was going away and that the through test of the trip was here, as the energy levels went down. However, I felt that my conservation of my introverted energy still helped me pull through many of the activities, even though I was not so active in conversation when we were riding in the jeepney. I feel that this is one of my strengths, that I am a person who is consistent, so I hope that was how I contributed to the team. The Chaperons also shared with us that although sometimes we do not realize it but everything we did touched peoples’ lives in one way or another.

Day 7, 13/12/06
Day 7 saw us going out to the elementary school in the morning. But before that I must share with you a truly hilarious experience that I had on a night I can’t really remember when but I think was on the morning of day 7. In the middle of the night I suddenly had the urge to go pangsai. So happened that when I was just about to finish, it blacked out. And I can tell you, the fear that overtakes you is truly overwhelming. I got out, went back to the room and fetched my torchlight, went back to the toilet and flushed it. But the moment I got back into bed the power came back on again. LOL. Anyway the water supply also ran out the next morning and it was really funny because I hadn’t bathed the night before as it was too cold, so I spent, yes, two days without bathing. Haha.

Anyway, the kids at the elementary school were rather noisy and there was no hall so we had to use a grass patch under the hot sun. This time we managed to cover the full ‘curriculum’ with them, including the songs, skit, story, and then later breaking up into different classes to conduct sessions with them. Shawn and I took a grade 4 class and we must say they were quite well behaved. We could really see them treasure the stuff we gave them, the markers, glue, scissors, and the craftwork. They meticulously coloured, cut and pasted the pieces of Joseph’s coat of many colours together. We then gave the prizes to the teacher to distribute for us, and taught them ‘With Christ in the Vessel’, which we had taught to so many other people before already.

In the afternoon we continued with the project work and fishing went fishing (I caught a fish, hurray!!), and then in the evening I gave my lesson on living a joyful Christian life to a slightly larger audience than before. I also asked uncle Edward and sister Sharon to share their experiences on living joyful Christian lives. Sharon’s testimony was that she was initially involved in the media industry but decided to take a break to do God’s work. Uncle Edward shared for quite long about his younger days and how his youth moulded his heart that he has now for poor people.

Following that me and Valmond proceeded to the house of the Ragindin family, the family who we first had a house Bible study with for the homestay, and we went there with Shawn, Andrea and Olivia who were going to brother Ernesto’s house for their homestay. If I’m not wrong one of the members of the Ragindin family was one of sister Mildred’s sisters. We then had supper which was chicken porridge made with native chicken and I decided to share a couple of verses about lamps and light, Matt 5 and Psalm 119:105, as they were using kerosene lamps as the electricity had not come back on yet.

That night me and Valmond didn’t sleep very well, because we trapped some mosquitoes under the mosquito net we had, and Valmond’s stick on repellant didn’t seem to work very well. Not to mention that I had to diarrhoea 3 times that night. Lol. But what I come to realize on the last day was that the Ragindin family had given all they could to us; the room that they gave up to us was actually their master bedroom. Which uncle Winston’s sharing lead me to draw the connection between their actions and the widow who gave her last two small copper coins in the Bible.

Day 8, 14/12/06
Even though I almost didn’t feel well enough to go for the mountain hike that morning I still decided to go anyway, and I didn’t regret going because the mountain hike was a truly unforgettable experience. For the climb up the mountain, well yeah we were used to treading in mud already, but muddy slopes are a different thing, haha. There were also several streams with rocks that we had to be careful to step firmly on in order not to injure ourselves. When we reached the peak of the mountain, we went to check out a waterfall, and I can tell you that it was truly beautiful. I just sat at the top of the waterfall and took it all in without talking much to anybody. Yeah I did try to take one or two photos of the waterfall but it looked uncannily 2D and what is a waterfall without the sound of flowing water. One of the thoughts I had in my heart was that when I would be ready to go and meet God, I would be able to stand alone in the presence of God’s creation, and sing I Stand in Awe with all my heart yet not have tears stream down my face. Then I would know I’m ready to be reunited with God in heaven. But that’s something I’m not able to do now.

We also witnessed the baptism of a sister Jovy at the pool near the waterfall, and she was moved to tears as well, as uncle Winston baptized her into Christ, in the natural and beautiful surroundings of God’s creation. How I wish my baptism were like that haha.

The trip down was equally tiring, but the view as breathtaking. The tall grass was quite sharp and gave us quite a bit of cuts, and the path pretty muddy too. My sandals probably carrying twice its actual weight on the way down because of the mud caked to it, and the grass that stuck to the mud. But how I wish we had more time to take in the view of the mountains from where we were. Forget Bukit Timah hill man.

It was then back to the Ragindin family for a shower and then back to the church for the campfire. Oh yes I forgot to mention that shower heads and piped water too, are a luxury. Chances are your bath will be out in the open, but me and Valmond were lucky that the Ragindin family had Comfort Room (CR, toilet) with a door (no lock btw) to bathe in. But I did get to bathe out in the open once because of a communication problem but never mind it was a good experience haha.

The turnout for the campfire that night was much larger than usual, and we gave the performance and skits our all. Shawn’s lesson was great, and the ‘Why me?’ skit was really powerful, so powerful that brother Jhun Ma was too choked up to give the invitation and Kelvin had to impromptu it. I really hope that during the campfire many hearts were touched, and that new people would be attracted by the church, to God. We then returned to our homestay families, and I gave a closing verse, 1 Thes 5:16 – 23 for the Ragindin family and gave the family a map of Singapore as a personal gift.

Day 9 15/12
We woke up at 5:30am this morning (with crazy screams from Alistair over the walkie-talkie and amidst a leg cramp) to go down to church and bid farewell to the people there. And I can tell you, there was not a dry eye left, and I did keep my tears inside me either. The emotion was that of gratefulness for their hospitality, for how they gave of themselves to us like the woman with two mites, to show us how simple their lives were, and the song we sang ‘If We Never Meet Again’ really summed it all up, that even though we might never see each other again, we would see each other on that beautiful shore, of heaven. The feeling was really indescribable, and I will never forget the people I met there. Oh and just before I left the church, I decided to leave my black guitar behind, as after I looked at all they had given us, so much out of their poverty, my guitar didn’t really mean so much to me that I couldn’t give it away, and besides I couldn’t let them play on that cracked piece of wood with strings attached that couldn’t hold its tuning, that they called a guitar. Well I don’t know how long my guitar will stay without damage, but well that doesn’t really matter to me because every time I think of what they have done for us, everything else becomes so insignificant.

Taking in the scenery of Tuao from inside the Jeepney one last time, I could not help but feel that I would miss Tuao and especially the people there a whole lot. In the jeepney I said a silent prayer just thanking God for the whole experience and praying for all the people I came into contact with throughout the days we were there. We then made the long journey back to Manila where stayed at the luxurious Holiday Inn chalets, and ironically that was the only night that I had to use my sleeping bag with the floor, because there weren’t enough beds and I left my exercise mat back at the church. But it was okay because I told God that now that the important part of the trip was over he could let anything happen to me, including falling sick. That night we really had a heartfelt sharing and affirmations of each other, but only managed to get through halfway, and we retired to bed at 2:30am.

Day 10 16/12/06
This morning we continued with the affirmations and I shared my thoughts about the trip. So here it is.

Personality wise, I haven’t changed. I am still that quiet reserved boy who doesn’t really like change, and who doesn’t talk a lot. Preparation wise for this trip, I think its really amazing how I pulled through this trip, as it was really quite physically exhausting, especially that mountain climb which I estimate as more than 10km. Well you must understand that I didn’t do anything before the trip except for eat, sleep and play guitar. Mentally, I didn’t really have any expectations of what to expect on this trip, I just took whatever came. If we were going rice planting, fine. If there was a blackout, fine. If I had diarrhoea, fine. From what I see when I reflect, I was really, really riding on spiritual energy throughout the trip. To have survived with an average of six hours of sleep for more than a week is not something I do all the time, even during school term. The only thing I prepared for were the verses that I used in the sharing during the trip, and I think that really helped my spiritual growth even before we departed for the trip.

In terms of music, I’m still searching, and yes I think people generally cannot take long classical pieces. I think my standard of playing guitar has dropped drastically but it’s okay, I was doing God’s work throughout the trip. I’m still learning much about music, and I think I will not be able to answer what God’s true purpose for my music is until I die, so I will keep searching.

I will miss several things about Tuao. I will miss the beautiful scenery. Like what Kelvin shared, the parables of Jesus really come alive in Tuao, where we seem to go back in time to the times of Jesus. I will miss the beautiful never ending spans of rice fields, the blue skies, and of course the mountain scenery. Another thing I will miss is the concept of time in Tuao. In Singapore, I think we really place too much emphasis on time. A 45 minute journey to somewhere is really long to us. But in Tuao that’s how long we took to get to church each day. There is really no need to look at your watch when you’re there and that’s something I’d really miss because in Singapore we’re so couped up by schedules and deadlines and everything has to be so precise. But when I was in Tuao I just took whatever came my way, and my stress just disappeared.

This experience for me was different from other spiritual experiences in that it wasn’t a surreal emotional high experience. My emotional level generally remained relatively constant throughout the whole trip, and I would describe this trip as a very real experience, where the problems were real, and the people there were also so real. I will miss the people there, and I think the most important part of this mission trip was meeting the people. Brother Jhun Ma and Babe, who gave of themselves so selflessly, brothers Oscar and Ernesto who I talked to quite a bit, and their simple attitudes to life, and of course the Ragindin family who gave so much of themselves for us.

Throughout this trip I had been looking for a spark (uncle Winston preferred to call it glow) to keep with me after this trip, as what I know is that the greatest challenge I would face would be now when I’m back in Singapore and facing the challenges of schoolwork (I just found out I have 4 days to finish up the rest of my homework), the challenges of the people at school, the challenge of schoolwork, so much. And I was looking for this thing to keep with me when I came back to Singapore, and I think it all culminated on the last day when we were bidding our farewells to each other, that I understood that what I’d take back with me were the peoples attitudes towards life, that they had such great faith, that although sometimes they may not even have a profit during harvest time, and I look at myself and my dreams and my goals for success and I feel so ashamed. I have also learnt to take whatever comes my way, a step at a time, and I think that is how great things can be done. I also realize the power of scripture memory, as it really fills the mind with pure thoughts. What I have been doing all this while was to simply memorise book, chapter, verse but not the very words of life, and this is my resolve in continuing my Christian life. I know it will be hard to change some of the ways I see and view things, but I’m sure God will be with me in this.

Through the sharing that drew till this morning, I think all of us who went on this trip have been drastically changed for the better after this trip, and I know that this trip will be only a stepping stone for more to come, and so I close with the final statement:

‘I am blessed by this trip because of the warmth and hospitality of the people there, and the simplicity of their faith in God.’

2006-12-06T14:16:00.000+08:00

the mission trip is here already!! tml we'll be waking up at unearthly hours in the morning so that we can get to the airport by 5:30am.

well there are several thoughts running through my mind now.. bugging thoughts of how i'm going to finish my homework when i come back, which i will cast out shortly. feelings of apprehension. yes we have a schedule and all.. but on a first mission trip.. who can be really sure of what to expect?

fears that i will get inadequate sleep..

lol.

the past few days have been a whirlwind. its like trying to write a completely new page of a diary over a year's worth of entries. and i've never felt closer to God than for more than a year. and this is only the beginning.. who knows what the experience in the phillipines will bring next.

well then so do keep us in our prayers. until saturday the 16th when we return, cya.

2006-11-30T14:13:00.000+08:00

IT'S OVER!! and i just know i'm gonna get withdrawal from not practising guitar consistently after today.

having a blog is a good thing, cos you can see what happened for last year's exam with a click of the button. so off i went, in shirt, tie and pants, plus adidas jacket. and indeed the exam centre was cold.

but the exam room itself wasnt. at the end i was sweating.

anyways, today i was as prepared as i could be, letting the learning curve go down a little after one day of rest and then kicking it up again. to my surprise i saw my math teacher who my guitar teaches there, taking his grade 2 exam. haha he was quite nervous.

and then two of my frens from acjc came, thx to them too. altho i got kicked out of a studio cos they dint allow me to warm up in there, -.-, they still let me practise softly outside the exam room. i played through a few studies and through my composition theme and variations on as the deer, which evokes so much emotion, and then it was time to go in (albeit a bit of delay from problems with the examiner's MD player.)

when another unlikely area i was prepared in is that i had already seen who my examiner was, saw him yesterday at st anthony's cannosian secondary school when i went to pick up a score from my guitar teacher, and altho him seemed a bit dao ytd, today he didn't remember seeing me yesterday at all and was very nice. haha.

what i remember is: normal performances of la catedral and recuerdos and capricho arabe, a bit jammed in magic flute, and a slight memory lapse in english suite, and stopping the last chord a little to hard lol. too happy its over already. so once again my conclusion that there is no best performance, if ur prepared enough you dont need luck to pull u through, cos you'd be performing about a mean.

and i'm going to listen to jay chou now. haha bye.

Thank you God.

2006-11-28T19:07:00.000+08:00

all this while i didn't have a testimony related to guitar, but after today, i do.

being a good musician isn't all about being able to play all the correct notes.

it isn't about fame

it isn't about how many cds you've recorded

it isn't about how good a conductor you are

it isn't about how many tours you've gone on

it isn't about the amount of musical knowledge you have

it isn't about receiving an mep scholarship

it isn't about receiving an atcl certificate

it isn't about studying music at university

it isn't about winning many competitions

there are so many things being a musician really isn't about.

what's most important about a good musician is the heart.

the ability to touch others lives through music

the dedication

it doesn't matter if you only touch a handful of lives

or give an imperfect performance

it is about the relationships built. the inspiration shared.

i don't know if music is eternal. but one thing's for sure, the things that are not seen, like the human soul, and relationships are.

some of the things you see above under what being a good musician isnt about are what my heart desires. but after today, it all doesn't matter anymore. because i have found my purpose for my music.

"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." - matthew 6:33

2006-11-27T22:56:00.000+08:00

3 days to the exam!! lolol.

well i've practiced about all i can.. about 2 1/2h today, and now i shall trust in God to pull me through already. tml i'd probably just practice a bit then give a recital at st anthony's canossian sec (my guitar teacher teaches there) and then wed is rest day, and thursday is IT. but i dun think i'd be elated after the exam, after all its just another run of the pieces that i've been playing for so long.

but the prep work i must say is really a lot!! even for non-musical stuff. today i spent much of my time getting my scores zapped, and rawr i had to scan them in, send them downstairs to the com with a laser printer, adjust brightness and contrast, and print!! and then my laser printer started to run out of ink.. so went downstairs and got ripped off for the rest of the copies at $3 for 14 pages. -.-

mission trip is coming soon too!! oh dear i have yet to memorise those song lyrics. haha. cya.

2006-11-25T17:31:00.000+08:00

its 5 days to the guitar exam!! haha.

and contrary to what i was thinking, that i wudnt be able to do much to change my playing during the last wk, after listening to some recordings of other people playing i think that theres a lot i can improve on. so its back to practice practice practice!! lol.

was also thinking about what joanne seah shared with us about finding ur life partner: the scene is one of you running towards God. the one whom u will marry is not someone who runs ahead of you, too difficult to catch, or who runs behind you, being dragged along, but rather someone who runs beside you.

hmm but i realised i'm a bit hard to run beside. i wonder who God will send. haha.

2006-11-16T23:26:00.000+08:00

i've been missing from the blog for a quite few days.. so heres an ultra long update!! lolol.

quite an eventful few days i must say. monday. went to acjc in the morning to give a run of my atcl repertoire for the acjc guitar ensemble. also helped my guitar teacher teach a bit. must say that the run at acjc was probably one of my best ever. really on form. then my guitar teacher persuaded me to go to tpjc to give my recital again. 'get it done with' he said.. so i dun need to go up on another day. and so i went. and ugh tired but still managed to pull through without any devastating errors.

on the way back my guitar teacher managed to persuade me to help him teach the next day, so heres what happened on tuesday. first went to st anthony's cannossian sec sch to help teach. i shant say much but if the examiner gets bored listening to all those grade 1 and 2 students, imagine what i felt when listening to some of them play their pieces for me. and then i imagine what my guitar teacher goes through much of the time. mannnnn.

after that headed to mgs, the sister school, where the first batch of 9 students pioneering the guitar group there had lesson, for some of them the last b4 their exam. this group was special cos they're mep students as well. well once again i shant say much haha. i guess my story as an mep student and guitarist applies to them the most, hope they took away something from my playing even though i was so tired that i added an extra rondo section to the last movement of one of my pieces.

yesterday was spent slacking. a well deserved slack. teaching is TIRING.

well anyway even if i dont become a teacher, the guitar will be my friend for life anyway. did i mention that teaching is unbelievably tiring?

and today. before i talk about today, you know, guys dun shop a lot, but honestly i think guys at the end of the day spend a lot more money than women. take my shoes for example.. one pair of mine can buy up to six pairs for my mom. okay but thats beside the point.

today i wanted to go to the city hall area to buy 1) recording equipment i.e. a mike and an mp3 player with a mike line in 2) new guitar strings to change to make sure nothing excessively interesting happens during my atcl, lets say for example a string breaking 3) this cool maple capo i saw at davis guitar 4) any cd with a segovia recording of bach's chaconne

so first the recording equipment. i knew exactly where the mike was, just needed a device. i was pretty sure creative mp3 players had a line in for a mike, and ended up almost pissing one of the Challenger service staff off cos i kept insisting that creative mp3 players did have a line in. but they dint. sigh. anyway to cut a long story short i dint buy any recording equipment.

then went to buy the only two things i bought today on my own.. the guitar stuff. HMV classical guitar section = useless. espl library guitar section = useless.

btw espl lib doesnt accept cash lah. -.- so went back feeling pretty unaccomplished.

then this evening went to look around audio house with my father. shopping with my father is still the best cos 1) he has a car 2) he has resources to buy stuff 3) he knows a lot more than me about where to buy good stuff. managed to buy a stereo voice recorder for $239 and the recording quality with the built in mike was quite stunning already. i tried to record with mr choo's condenser mike and the result was so freaky cos even people who lived 50 years ago dint have this sorta technology in their time. and now we can get the same effect for slightly under $350. and lots of other modern amenities like the ability to copy and enhance and etc. the power of technology. haha.

kk long post. cya. :)

2006-11-02T20:00:00.000+08:00

woohoo!! my chinese exam is over!!

i really thank God for seeing me through the papers today even though i was totally exhausted after a poor night's rest. it looks like i dint really make any startling careless mistakes, and in my compo i used 10 cheng yus!! lol. i cudnt help it.. once an approriate one came into my mind i just decided to stick it in a sentence.

and after the exam i went out with my friends to kbox.. how ironic lol. and we (or rather i) have discovered the secret of an additional remote control u can request for the moves the pitch of the song about. extremely helpful for basses like me who want to sing jay chou or wang li hong. but was quite fun.. but got no nehe around so a lot of our songs ended up sounding quite terrible haha.

yeap so that puts a stopper in the flow of exams for this month. nxt one is on 30th nov, the all important guitar exam.

2006-10-28T22:06:00.000+08:00

woah its been a long time since i last blogged!!

the holidays have started!! woohoo!! and i have lots of things i want and have to do.. some of the stuff include the 4000 word essay i have to do, at least i made a start haha, about 3 more other essays, music compositions, and practice for my upcoming guitar exam.

and of course do lots of nothing.

and then in dec its off to the phillipines for the mission trip!! and then beijing with my family, and then a partial youth camp cos i got guitar practice, will try to get myself excused as much as possible :(

just about a while ago i opened some obscure cabinets located at the outskirts of my room.. and one of them contained lots of old old old stuff that i used to play with, rather intellectual stuff i must say lol.. connect 4, a tangram, mastermind, puzzles, as well as a stack of unused origami paper, and hordes and hordes of origami i made, and i was in shock for a while how i made so much of it. no wonder i can still remember how to fold paper cranes up to this day. lol.

childhood memories. and i caught the last 15 minutes of spongebob this morning on kids central at 9:15.. RARR i miss being able to watch kids central without this voice at the back of my head screaming 'you're retarded! you're retarded!' while i'm at the channel. lol i really miss kids central. lol.

ok then. cya

2006-10-19T17:15:00.000+08:00

i thank God for the results he has given me today. sure i'm not the top for anything, as my mind so dearly craves, but what God has awarded to me today was above my expectations already. i cudn't ask for more.

sure, there are many reasons that i could have to be disappointed, among them the introduction of this elitist 'dean's list' thing by the school, which i didn't qualify for haha.

but then again to be disappointed would be to be ungrateful to God and what he has granted me. i'm also happy for my close friends who are happy with their results. its nice to hear friends say that they are happy with their marks.

i'd like to conclude with a verse Colossians 3:23, 'Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men'. i think this verse is most appropriate at this time, as it reminds us it is God who ultimately pulls us through. :)

2006-10-14T21:18:00.000+08:00

hello!!

today i'd like to blog about an article i read in the straits times today by tan seow hon.. its on page S17, review, titled 'True love? Look no further than friendship'. yeap it basically talks about how love has become overrated in our society, and yeap how the first thing that comes to people's minds when they hear the words true love is romantic love. but the writer of the article suggests a different type of true love, which is that of strong friendship.

one of the things the writer mentioned was that "We do not share our deepest secrets with our business associates; we may eat a satisfying burger with an acquaintance, but it is with our best friend that we think of sharing with great relish the description of our discovery os something mundane like delicious food." and i think thats quite true, considering i talk the most and do the most out of point things when i'm with my closest friends :D

so perhaps while i'm not so gifted in the area of romantic love, (eheh) if true love is having rock solid friendships, then i've definitely experienced it already.

buargh and tagboard has mutated into some dunno what cPanel thing.. dunno if it is a scam to get u to reveal ur password or what.. haha i have a good mind to dump the tagboard again.

haha yeap thats my thoughts for the day. cya.

2006-10-11T17:07:00.000+08:00

SO.

its all over. but the end isnt as sweet.. the end of last thursday was sweeter haha. maths yesterday was terribly hard, and following a four day break from exams, = not veri good. well but i've told God that i'd accept whatever grade comes my way for maths, and of course for the rest of my papers. because i'm sure God will be fair to me and reward me according to the amount of effort i've put in.

music was quite okay. i spent quite a while cramming in all the set work and world music stuff.. and i guess it paid off. the music exam was really fun.. we all had to bring cd players cos the exam tracks are on the cd (u get to play them over and over again. haha but u onli have abt half an hour per track) and my awesome cd player i loaned from my friend cant work if it ain't plugged in. so i got to sit nxt to a socket point hahaha, amidst a comment by the teacher that i was lucky it wasn't raining today. lol.

after music we went to vivocity.. AND.. aiyah dun go lah. so crowded.. plus shops also not say veri good (well at least not those on the 2nd floor which we walked through) and now harbourfront's going to be terribly crowded because theres nothing to eat at vivocity except for carl's jr, which was probably terribly crowded too, not to mention the building looks like my school in the early stages of construction. walk down a corridor and u see shop posters being put up, goods being shipped in, and u go up to the top floor and theres construction work going on. but had great fun hanging out with friends and just talking nonsense at pastamania. hmm there aren't a lot of nice places to visit in singapore.. which are truly quiet and serene. maybe the airport.. but the travelling time spoils everything haha.

so what am i going to do after the exams? haha my life after exams and when i dun have exams doesnt really differ much. as long as i've got free time i just spend time on music, music and music. and yeap most of my hol assignments are music based anyway. and i will try to complete it in november so that dec can be free for mission trip!! and for some family holiday trip my parents are planning.

k then. cya!!

2006-10-04T21:44:00.000+08:00

hello!!!

the first 3 days of exams are over.. and i must say God has really been good to me during these days. even though before and after the exam i was feeling most lethargic and tired, during the exam itself i was rather 'on form' haha. but looking back i realise that it must have been God giving me the strength, i would never have been able to pull myself through the past few papers without God's providence.

tml is econs, then the first, and most bit of my exams would be over!! cos theres just math P2 nxt tues and music nxt wed. woohoo!!

i'm listening to the offering's 'walking down heaven's road' now and its a really joyful song!! haha. but i cant seem the find the lyrics on the net. must really be quite an original composition haha. and they're really good.

yeapp well thats all for now.. i hope my brain cools down in time for me to get a good night's sleep!! haha. cya.

2006-09-30T22:32:00.000+08:00

well then. its just a mere day left before the FYs.

i've kind of accepted the amount i've attempted to study over the past 3 wks.. phys is more or less done, any more practice will be surplus.. maths is on the verge of completion and theres tml to memorise every single thing i can about econs before the week begins, and also read through the chinese newspapers just to get my brain tuned to chinese.

i thank God for helping me to organise my time relatively well. its been a crazy 3 wks of lack of sleep and sheer lethargy. just now i went down for petras' baptism and i cant even hold a proper conversation. too tired to talk. i dun think i'll be able to sleep tonight again, but im not that worried already, cos theres onli so much i can cover tml, and when the real exam starts i dun wanna study too much anymore, cos the energy focus shud be during the exam paper itself (especially for physics, its 3h 15 mins long!!!)

k then its off now to update my other blog. cya!

2006-09-25T14:12:00.000+08:00

looking back i really wonder how i pulled through.

round after round of exams. and still being able to maintain reasonable grades.. it truly amazes me.

its been some time before i've been through a full examination. the last time was in sec 4 last year.. this year's cts dint really count, i took onli 2 papers.

i guess im onli paying the consequence of the year's work, or shud i say slack. haha i admit that guitar does take up a lot of my time, and i guess when it comes to the exam period i pay for it.. cos i wasnt consistent enough during the year.

lets say i treated my studies as i did guitar, and lets say for every one hour time slot i've practiced guitar this year i did revision on what the teacher taught that day...

i wudnt have to study at all when it came to exams.

well but that isnt the case.

dint go to sch today.. dun ask me why, last night when i went to lie down at 7pm i told myself i wudnt go.. im not like unbelievably sick with a high fever or what.. i woke up at 6:20 with the usual headache i've had for the past few days, and just told my mum i dint want to go. took one panadol and woke up at 10:15. remarkable eh. thats 15 hours in bed. hahaha.

well then, my thoughts are a mess, i wonder where i'm going, and i'm having the usual pre-exam fatigue that makes u do unreasonable stuff like.. sleep for 15 hours? hahaha.

well then. i was reading through my archives of the exam period around the same time last year. it was quite amazing how my posts dun make me sound like i was half-dead during that period, even though i know i was.

but as the papers passed, one by one, my strength seemed to return (along with my sanity i guess haha).

i guess exams is something all of us have to go through. i've asked God for just enough energy.. just enough energy to last till the end of music paper on 12 oct. i dun care if i collapse after music or what. i just need enough energy to finish the music paper.

i feel like i need to break out of this imploding thinking.. this mental state of impending doom that keeps reminding you what u need to do, what u havent studied.. to crave knowledge just because u find it interesting.. that wud be cool.

and would certainly make exams seem very much un-exam-like.

2006-09-17T20:49:00.000+08:00

it's that time of the week again when theres actually a pile of work waiting for u and u have yet to practice guitar for the day, but just want to do nothing, update all 3 of ur blogs and take in the coolness of the sunday evening.

after all, homework is never finished.

today was quite a good day, other than the bout of physics revision that i had in the afternoon which i will not blog about haha. what i found in uncle adrian's sermon was quite interesting, with the reality of the 'twentysomethings' being quite true.. i hope when i become 'twentysomething' i will not fall away from the church just becos we cant really fit into youth activities anymore.

joseph's sermon was quite interesting too. well done joseph!!

and i shall spend the rest of my night experimenting with jazz chords and updating my 2 other blogs. cya!!

2006-09-11T21:51:00.000+08:00

after hearing some of jay chou's new songs..

well they all sound quite nice.. but somehow i get this feeling that they all copy something from somewhere.. familiar sounds from previous albums, and one of the intros to one of the songs sounded like a chinese version of backstreet boys' 'the call' haha. maybe jay chou is becoming too westernised lolol. the sound is difficult to explain.. its quite unlike anything the mando-pop music world has heard before. so definitely distinctively jay chou. haha.

today in school there was this hilarious incident where i peered down at my left leg that was crossed over my right in music class only to find a cockroach perching happily on the lower half of my pant leg.

what followed was absolutely crazy hahaha. i so happened to be sitting nxt to 3 female classmates and when i shook off the cockroach the girl sitting nxt to me let out this terribly ultra high pitched scream that added to the hysteria. so i chase the cockroach around with a chair trying to kill it (cos i dint want to get my shoe dirty u see) and after many misses finally managed to trap it under a chair leg but after exerting quite a bit of force it still wasnt dead. i tell u cockroaches have some ultra hard shell or smth. like eww lah.

the mep teacher added a few fatal blows to it using another teacher's submissions box and.. lol i dunno, but i was totally freaked out lah. guys arent supposed to be scared of cockroaches or what.. and im the sort who cant scream. but i think in this type of situations anybody has the right to be freaked out.. i mean who wants a cockroach climbing halfway up your leg?

lol absolutely hilarious.

2006-09-09T22:18:00.000+08:00

hello. its been slightly under a wk.

i think irvin's perception of studies and examinations as a performance last night was quite insightful.. if only i treated my studies like my practice of guitar.. im somehow always ready to play something, and when it comes to a performance i dun need to overstress myself or what to play well.

but the problem is i dun do one hour of solid revision a day. which is what i should start doing soon.

the pursuit of knowledge i find is very unique. if u have the true heart of a learner and seek your own knowledge, u wud treasure it better, and remember it better too, rather than study it cos u must. like how i do with music.

if onli i had more time. well i know what i must do to pull myself through final year. i know that if i dun play my part God wun give me the ultimate push. so i know its my responsibility too to be committed to my studies.

k then thats all for now. cya.

2006-09-03T22:34:00.000+08:00

and its that time of the year again. the sept hols.

i have absolutely no recollection of how my previous sept hols were spent, but this time i need to rest first before the final sprint. of cos the guilt feeling will set in and hopefully i'll get some work done in the midst of my resting haha.

today's sermon again revolved around a common theme that had been going on for the past few sermons, not to worry but to be happy. indeed we really need to take each it one tick at a time. as in really one day at a time. i realised how much i worry so much about the things that are to happen in the tomorrow and keep thinking about things in the past. maybe we should just.. think about today!! haha.

uncle cher yam came up with a joke 'which two days of the week shouldn't we worry about?' and the answer was yesterday and tomorrow. but sitting nxt to gareth i cudnt resist telling him a variation of the joke.. 'on which two days of the week shouldn't we worry on?' answer: to-day lah!!

ok veri funny chen yi. haha. cya.

2006-08-28T19:58:00.000+08:00

as i go back to sch on a monday morning, i really realise how powerful God is when i return to a normal, quiet person who gets tired after a long day of school.

facing the same challenges before the sermon, still going through the same school days. on the average day, i'm just an average person. but when i asked God to help me in my sermon so that it would be for His glory only, he 'showed me great and mighty things that i knowest not'.

for those who missed my sermon, the outline is on my new blog, http://somelittlethoughts.blogspot.com

God Bless and have a good week!!

2006-08-27T20:31:00.000+08:00

praise God.

i really wouldn't have been able to bring the sermon across without God's help. and, prayer REALLY works. i was praying a lot leading up to the sermon and God really answered my prayer.

i still feel that i was definitely inadequate to preach a sermon on Passion for Christ, but it is God's words that are the most important, not the deliverer.

for those who missed my sermon, you missed quite a something!! haha.

once again, praise God.

where is your treasure?

2006-08-26T12:53:00.000+08:00

a really really really belated pic from the youth camp in june haha.. cos i cudnt find the cable for my phone until recently.
its a pic of my youth camp group, Keepers Of The Light, the first CHAMPION group i've been in since i can remember yout camps. haha. if you count there are 15 of us squeezed at a table, cos we wanted to sit as a group but cudnt take 2 tables. haha amazing.

2006-08-26T11:58:00.000+08:00

ahh its been some time.

been really busy this wk, but glad all the work's over, and i have the weekend to rest and do my sermon.

yesterday marked the end of my IB English A1 15% oral presentation exam, so glad its done over with. and also there was a concert put up by us class of year 5s yesterday, so i was a bit late for careteam haha. overall i think it was really great, i hope people have been inspired by it.

when i grow up and finally learn to drive, i wanna drive a hot hatch!! hahaha. today in Life! Motoring reported that theres a new contender in the market, the ford focus ST, for slightly under $100k its quite a powerful car. not bad looking too. but of course, this is really IT, the volkswagen golf gti.

but with that kind of money with a bit more u prob can buy a merc already. haha.

and you've gotta think i'm crazy to start imagining what car i want to drive next time when im still 17 and clueless about driving. haha.

ok then thats all, cya!!

2006-08-18T23:40:00.000+08:00

well since i'm not sleeping yet, i have time for one more post!! haha. like make-up post for all the days that i dint post lol.

yuck theres like a curry stain on the '9' on my keyboard.. eww. who was eating in front of the com -.- anyways, just came back from a fantastic concert thingy at geylang coc by four missionaries. their singing was really powerful and impactful. makes me want to attend the 'singing clinic' they're conducting tml haha.

well heres some stuff that i've been thinking about bgr and conclusions i've reached.
1) in my jc life, i WILL NOT get attached, because, a) i'm too young and immature and not up to handle a relationship and b) cos it will affect my studies.
2) attraction and infatuation is a big bundle of problems, and yes sometimes i guess its inevitable in the process of growing up, but i really do not want it to stain a good, pure friendship. i trust in God to help me in this, as in Phillipians 4:6- 7 the bible says that if we pray and petition to God, He will guard our hearts and minds.
3) i don't want to flirt in sch, or anywhere else, cos, well, its kinda pointless, and Proverbs 31:30 says 'Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.' in this verse its referring to women, but dont men try to exercise charm as well? haha.

and 4) but not really related, i refuse to talk about people behind their backs unless i can say what i tell others about them right in their face, in front of them.

all this said, sometimes it looks like i have nothing to talk about, but i realised with a bit of courage one can still be an interesting person without having to talk too much about worldly things.

2006-08-18T17:51:00.000+08:00

Ecclesiastes 2:22 - 25:
What does a man get for all the toil and anxious striving with which he labors under the sun? All his days his work is pain and grief; even at night his mind does not rest. This too is meaningless. A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?

u noe sometime back i was reading ecclesiastes and this verse really struck me, but i never really did understand it. its ok to be on about sch work and stuff, but to find satisfaction is another thing. but well i guess its true, after working on my maths portfolio for some time today.. it does bring satisfaction when i see i've actually done something.

work is also good, cos it takes the mind off wandering and aimless thinking, which, i think i do a lot haha. but of cos not forgetting time to rest and reflect.

too bad a lot of people attending sch dun find having satisfaction in work a cool thing.

2006-08-12T20:05:00.000+08:00

recently i've been doing some searches on the net on the churches of Christ.. found quite a bit of stuff.. including some pretty scary stuff too.

wikipedia has an article, and a veri long one at that too haha.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Church_of_Christ
well i dint have a chance to read thru everything.. and i doubt i will have a chance to until im like really free, but i wudnt trust everything on it, as its wikipedia after all man, and i guess pointing out that Pat Sajak (wheel of fortune tv host) is a member (which we also dunno how true, and we dun need to care right) is really a bit out of point.

http://www.churches-of-christ.net/
this one has listings of churches in each part of the world, altho rather unupdated i guess haha. and if u check out their 'tract rack' its got a lot a lot of stuff.. on some veri interesting topics too.

well the net is pretty remarkable.. but lets not trust everything that it says, the Bible is our sole authority concerning matters of the church.

2006-08-10T12:39:00.000+08:00

ya noe.

sometimes ur life is just so crowded with activities and things to do that u just want to do nothing.

so u sit down and do nothing.

then at the end of doing nothing u feel bad that u've accomplished nothing.

its a vicious cycle.

so what should i do now.. something or nothing?

lol.

yesterday was basically just slacking at home and, doing nothing. lol. i COULD HAVE GONE TO NEHE'S HOUSE.. i told him no in the morning cos i thot my family was gonna have dinner together to celebrate my mum's bday, which is today. turns out my sister wanted to watch the NDP (which i'm not too enthusiastic on catching) SO my father bought dinner back for me and my sis. -.-^6.0 x 10^23. ahh well.

life hasnt always been smooth sailing for me this term.. i've been sliding down the spiritual coaster after life returned to normal after my shingles episode. its when i start to blend back into the world, and fail to be an exceptional person is when i start to lose focus.. so i'm just glad for this hol where i can refocus myself. for me sometimes is what takes up the most of my thoughts that determines my 'spiritual level'.. and when i've got school and guitar only floating around in my head.. its difficult to maintain focus. and theres a long way to go b4 the next hol.. so i'll be thinking of other solutions to get myself to stay focused on God from now till then.

yeap. its been long since i updated, haha. cya.

2006-08-07T22:25:00.000+08:00

Eccl 3

A Time for Everything

1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

you know, sometimes its just nice to be alone.

22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work, because that is his lot. For who can bring him to see what will happen after him?

2006-08-04T23:18:00.000+08:00

rawr the whole com screen is a blur cos i cant focus my vision. haha.

had a 3h-long eye check-up at singapore eye centre.. was really tiring.. and i found out that i have poor accomodation (in other words cant focus well). looks like the spectacle hut people's equipment is slighly faulty.. they actually showed that my right eye degree dropped like 100 degrees when it didnt really. haha dun trust spectacle hut.

well just now at the eye centre i got my eye dilated.. thats why i cant focus for near vision.. its amazing i still can make a blog entry lol. at least i can still see far.. managed to make it to cheryl's house just now lol. so take care of ur eyes!! one of my greatest fears is to lose my sense of sight (besides losing sense of hearing haha).

well now that the week is once again over and i survived it, its time to sit back and think about other things.. like where my guitar practice is headed again. i seem to have lost my drive to play guitar after the competition held recently. then my drive to practice was that i have passion for the guitar.. but i need to renew my drive. i realised that i have not really committed my guitar playing to God, so i intend to do so.. and now i feel that i have let guitar take up so much of not onli my time, but also my thoughts, my worries... i need a new reason to practice guitar.

here's a quote from a friend from today.. it went something like 'pursuing excellence but being content when you dont achieve it'..

some truth in it huh?

2006-08-02T17:53:00.000+08:00

yeeeeee.

i just came back from spectacle hut.. cos i found out my specs were kinda damaged, the left lens came off in school.

then checked my eyes. and some phenomenal thing happened.. the astigmatism (how to spell?) in both of my eyes increased, but the degree in my right eye went down from 675 to like 525 or smth. like whoa. so i have to go and see a professional eye doctor on friday afternoon. ho hum. u noe i have this vague feeling that their machinery is slightly off. but yeah my vision feels weird.

like lol.

2006-07-31T19:29:00.000+08:00

u noe, i think singaporeans really shud be happier. is life in singapore that dismal.

i have enough with 'school sucks' and 'why am i in ib', or 'so-and-so teacher is lousy, lesson so boring' etc etc. it doesnt really matter if a teacher cant teach or what. as long as he or she can hold your attention for the lesson time thats all im looking for. and so what if theres a lot of homework.. i also have what. life is very fair one. and just now my maid was uttering this complaint under her breath about how i make tea to drink at night. urh.. its this sleepy tea from lijiang i bought. whats wrong with making tea at night? not like my tea is going to kill somebody or what. and my sis is forever throwing tantrums around the house. sigh.

see now im complaining too. lol.

went for a seminar on scholarships on saturday afternoon and this guy was talking about how singapore ranked 131 in a survey of happiness and no. 1 being people who live on this island called Vanuatu. hahaha. maybe we shud just sell all our stuff in singapore and go live on some deserted island. maybe then we'd be happy.

haha this is ultra funny, got this off a website declaring nigerians as the happiest people in the world:
PATH TO HAPPINESS

Genetic propensity to happiness

Marriage

Make friends and value them

Desire less

Do someone a good turn

Have faith (religious or not)

Stop comparing your looks with others

Earn more money

Grow old gracefully

Don't worry if you're not a genius

the onli point i disagree with is Earn more money. lolol.

2006-07-30T21:11:00.000+08:00

just to make sure my this blog is not dying, i shall update. haha.

sch is just.. sch. the weekend has been rather restful i guess, spent yesterday morning practising music then in the afternoon i went for some seminar on scholarships. yeap but what im really sourcing for is a scholarship that allows me to do music and something, not in singapore. anyone with contacts pls tell me hahah. went to watch my sch's chamber orchestra's concert in the evening.

today after church went to irvin's house to record some stuff for candice's birthday, which is tml, happy birthday candice!!! and went back to 6pm to lead songs, which i havent done in really long.

yup and after doing so much i feel tired, but rested. quite amazing. looks like i will skip practising guitar for tonight, its good to take a break once in a while haha.

ok then. today's been great. cya.

2006-07-26T20:36:00.000+08:00

ok chia lynn i've relinked u. lol all u ENFPs... like to change this change that.. i've had my blog for more than 1 1/2 years! and my sch blog is 2 years old.

its the middle of the wk and i guess im totally exhausted already. im somehow glad that my guit teacher cudnt have lesson tonight so i can rest and do some work. and have some time to myself.

ok random quote, found on a 12-roll toilet paper wrapper: "Are you buying more toilet paper or AIR?"

k nothing much. cya

2006-07-23T22:43:00.000+08:00

yesterday at mep concert me and my sec 3 friend pulled off some silly trick on stage to get the audience to laugh. we interupted the performance to exchange guitars in a weird manner. heres how the conversation goes:

joshua lim: *smacks his guitar to make a noise
"Your guitar..

its nice..

its black.. (i was using my black coloured guitar haha)

i want it..."

me: "No you cant have it.."

joshua lim: why?

me: cos its mine

joshua lim: please?

me: No...

joshua lim: just for this performance?

me: *suspiciously "okay.."

joshua lim snatches the guitar from me and we continue with our performance, triumphant as the audience breaks into laughter.

you know these days i've been talking a lot to people older than me, like jason last wk, and also danny, a visitor today, about what they're studying in uni, or plan to study, or what they're doing.. and sometimes i cant help wondering about my own future. will i reallllly be pursuing music? what if i dont? so what age will i REALLY start dating? and who? what will my job be?

oh and today uncle lee hock shared with us again about later in life if we want to marry someone from another church and the differences in interpretation of doctrines and their effects.. yeap something to think about.

so many questions. but the thing is, i know the answers to none of the questions right now. i'm just trying to keep up with whatever work the sch throw at me (just found out about a physics prac due tml a few hours ago in my diary lol). and i really trust God to lead me wherever i go, in the next 1 1/2 yrs b4 army, during army and after that. i cant really see veri far ahead, but, Romans 8:28.

ok tts all for now. gtg sleep.. with my partially finished physics prac. haha.

2006-07-19T22:21:00.000+08:00

sometimes God calms the storm that is raging..

but sometimes God lets the storm rage and calms the child.

2006-07-16T20:04:00.000+08:00

today's competition.. or rather 'competition' was.. well rather disappointing.

the whole set up was well.. not the best of performance settings. cold, no warm up.. enough to get u nervous and shaking. plus the hall we were playing in the acoustics werent made for guitar playing, and they dint give us mike, so i think we couldnt be heard effectively beyond the first row.

well typical average performance i guess. haha mr choo says we shud take less time to tune. and joshua lim super champion.. turn up for competition in his signature black shirt, berms and sandals. like LOL lah. but i think his tango en skai was quite ok. but like wise the projection factor just spoils it all. there was one other 'competitor' in our segment, a violinist who looked as if she had already completed her ATCL or something. she was awarded a bronze, while me and joshua were awarded certificates of participation.

so..

1) dun take so long to tune

2) dun use strings that u've nvr used b4 for a competition

3) the audience makes quite a big difference to a performance.. this audience was small, and a bit cold.. nvr clap after the first piece, only clap at the end of the perf. and performing to music HL class, and complete strangers is totally different.

4) if possible, DO try to warm up b4 a performance

5) for guitars get a mike if the place is too big and u cant project

6) they need to invent on the spot hand warming devices

7) i want a new guitar lol.

ah well. the bus ride back was more draining than the competition itself. enough said then. i'm going to go console myself by playing guitar again later. haha.

2006-07-14T15:38:00.000+08:00

went back to sch today for music exam. decided to treat it more as a fun thing rather than an exam.. that way can take it with less stress haha.

indeed it is weird to go back to sch after 7 days of resting. its nice to be able to wake up every morning over the past few days and experience the morning and reflecting instead of worrying what periods there are on that day and sitting couped up in class where u feel only the aircon and see only the whiteboard and worksheets.

music exam was okay.. but was really pooped after the paper.. cos i havent pushed myself to think so hard in a wk haha. and also my shingles are STILL not completely gone.. so i came back to sleep haha.

care team tonight is at hannah's house. kk tts all.. cya

2006-07-10T16:47:00.000+08:00

"if you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got." - Howard Hoffman

it's always good to do something new everyday, i think i will be striving for that haha.

today in the newspapers reported in life section page 7 about this taiwanese singer with the same PIN YIN name as me.. thankfully not exact same chinese characters. haha was really funny when shawn pointed it out to me this morning. the whole article is so corny lah. and his album cover looks absolutely disgusting, its titled elf.

yucks!! haha. just looking at it makes my skin go all funny.. like it wasnt funny enough.

2006-07-09T21:44:00.000+08:00

hello again.

its day 3 of mc.. and the pain is kinda starting to set in. the website says that some patients cant even bear their clothes touching their affected area of rash.. and i'm becoming one of them haha. its kinda tormenting just rolling in bed trying to find a comfortable position and not being able to fall asleep. was so pooped today that i cudnt go to church in the morning. was still kinda groggy in the late afternoon but i told myself that i shud go for 6pm (:

ytd just spent the afternoon talking to my good band fren from acjc. enjoyed the time, but was pooped after that lol. looks like i get pooped real easily. then when i try to sleep cannot -.- haha.

yeapp still got 4 more days of mc/holiday left. i'll be resting well. if u want can come and visit me also *wink*

2006-07-07T15:36:00.000+08:00

well the past few days have been a whirlwind of events.

it's been mugging non stop for the exams the past few days.. econs was 50% complete, physics was also arnd 50% complete, and maths was 75% complete. took the english exam ytd and it was okay.

however, i visited the doctor in the evening and i was told that the red spots on my chest and back are shingles.. gave me a 7 day mc and told me i'm not even allowed to study.

well. at first it was really mixed feelings.. i felt okay enough to sit through the maths and chinese papers today!! haha. but all my planning finally failed. i've really seen the hand of God through this incident.. i've planned and planned and planned so that i will make the exams.. but Isaiah 55:8 says "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. instead now i'm given a seven day almost holiday, asked not to have any stress at all and just rest. i'm indeed grateful as it is liberation of my mind. it's been enslaved for really long.. and i've just been longing for some rest i read of in matthew 11:28.. and i think i've finally got it. well at least for now.

called the sch this morning, and the Presiding examiner dint really tell me what was goign to happen to me.. just wanted to know what happened and said 'rest well, bye' and hung up lol. so will i make up for the missed papers? i dunno, and perhaps its better that i dont, so i will have less stress lol.

2 Cor. 12:9 says "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." sometimes we just need to be slapped really hard so that we will realise something. i'm glad i'm so sick now.. cos that means i have more time to rest, a reason to change my ways in sch, and also more time for God.

James tells us in his book chapter 1:2, to 'Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,' well i guess this is one of the trials that has brought me joy.

and i really realise how much i love my mum.. shes gone to US until the 24th, and wont be around to keep my company when i'm sick :( haha my dad's ok.. but he onli asked me if i called the sch when i was like.. awake at 9:30am. and i dun have the security of my mum's care. ah well.

anyways if u were wondering what shingles was, well whats important is that its not contagious, as in u cant catch it from somebody else, and hits you when ur immune system is down, which was probably the case for me. the rash is on my back and chest, and onli infects one side of ur body, so i looked normal in sch. other than that, its supposed to be really bad; the rest of the symptoms u can go read up yourself :P

ok then. i can go SLACK now. :))

2006-07-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

hello!! i'm here to blog about random stuff.

ya noe on msn i have like 150+ contacts.. but i only talk to about 10 or so? haha funny. msn wasnt the way it is when it was first launched.. or maybe it was.. hmmm.....

anyway i'm kinda going nuts from studying already. i dun really study for more than 2 or 3h a day when i'm at home.. cos i find that anything more than that isnt really effective. or maybe my brain just doesnt work normally.

the exam period feeling is coming on again.. during exam period i just cannot really control my thoughts anymore.. cos everything is just flying around in my head.. all that additional data of physics, maths and econs is causing a lot of discourse. which isnt veri gd cos i'm isTj.. Thinker.. and i think a lot. argh so i wish i cud think a lot less things and just let my mind rest. soon soon. 2 more wks. grr all you people who dun have exams.. you know who you are.. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU.. lol. diao.

i've been thinking about the option of pursuing music as career.. and its getting kinda farfetched. cos the options are diminishing.. it really hit me when my tuition teacher talked to me about it.. the music scene in singapore just isnt really good. but in the end, whatever i study in uni and whatever i do in the working world in the future, the important thing is that God's purpose for me is fulfilled. and music will continue to burn in me.. even if i dun work as a musician. options of feeding a family and all. yeap.

and also you know i was thinking.. at this age exchanging 5 sentences of conversation with someone of the opposite gender a day is a lot already.. anything feels excessive or weird? haha i dunno. so random. next time it will change i guess when i grow more mature. communication is really important in marriage. oh and i realised a lot of funny behaviour of the youth like having crushes on people and doing weird things cos of feelings is cos of maturity.. or rather a lack of it. i've definitely learnt a lot this year.. but i've still got lots to learn. i think its really important for the mind to be guarded by the Spirit.. cos thats how we will have peace, as in Romans 8.

ok sorry for the big spam of thoughts but thats what happens during exam periods i guess.. haha dun worry it onli comes twice a year. cya.

2006-06-29T17:57:00.000+08:00

recently there has been a lot of activity going on on the tagboard in my sch blog. kind of like overspills from the exchange programme between acsi and plmgs guitar. i dunno.. even though i know the tags are kinda harmless.. i cant help but feel intimidated nonetheless. and i dun even remember how the 2 people who tagged most recently look like. and its also kinda scary knowing that so many strangers have excess to ur blog, where u share some of the most personal stuff.

hence i am just stoning and waiting for one of my sch friends to come back and tag and push the 3 weird tags down. lol. cos i am too fearful to post a new entry, or to reply to the tags. so bad hor me.

i dunno.. maybe its just me..

anyway.. its less than a wk to exams.. gasp!! but somehow my 'mugging strategies' differ all the time. for one, i cant study more than 1h at a go. second, i cant study more than 3h at home. and although my proportion of resting period to study time is very lobsided, somehow i've still made it all these years.. right? hmm. anyway i dun believe in cramming or stuffing in info until ur so dead tired u cant remember anything (which happens at the 2 or 3h mark), but rather just pay attention in class, do my homework and it shud stay in and come in handy with some polishing for future tests or exams.

yeap so its back to my disproportionate resting time from now till dinner and until 7. lolol. cya

2006-06-28T17:48:00.000+08:00

today was my 2nd day of mc.. and after 2 days of doing close to nothing and just sleeping, i feel better. i hope tonight i can sleep well.. if not my sore throat will come back again.

all u naughty things who dun have sch.. u noe who u are.. grr..

2006-06-25T22:15:00.000+08:00

so. its 10:15 on a sunday night. and im not sleepy lol. took a nap in afternoon.

tonight was shawny's sermon!! yay well done with the armour of God. next month is joseph.. then me!! ahh. haha. at least i got a topic already :)

yeap i decided to reflect on this hols tonight b4 i sleep.. actually planned to play guitar first at 8:30 then blog.. but i play play play.. then eh?! 10pm already. lol.

this hols has been rather eventful.. besides going to sch for all that guitar stuff. first week was basically guitar stuff and getting ready for youth camp.. just staying at home and regaining energy first. also got the habit of listening to classical music.. had time to research a bit too.. enriching my mind. i find that i regain a lot energy when i just spend time alone to think. yeap.

camp was a blast. prayer really helps.. i prayed for my group members every day, haha even tho it was onli for 10 - 15 minutes each time but it certainly helped. my group cohered really well during the camp and i think everyone learnt something. this camp was really one of the best camps i ever had even tho i was not always with the normal core group of frens in church.. but that was probably why it was a good camp.. cos got made use of my weaknesses and helped me to get out of my comfort zone to do good things. 2 Cor. 12:9. games and lessons were really good too.

the few days after the camp saw WITHDRAWAL. hahahah. then all too fast, chia lynn left for vietnam after a farewell that was truly a blast. that week i also spent finishing up much of my music homework, and going out with old frens once.

last wk saw the last of the free days going.. and attempt to start studying. lolz. bulk of studying will be when sch reopens. lolol. aft that was at sch for 3 full days for guitar camp.. which was exhausting but learnt some things abt people and how guitar groups work.. cos it was an exchange programme between acs guitar orchestra and plmgs guitar.. so was really interesting to make observations and stuff. but exhausting. and could have been studying. lolool. like real.

wanted to make full use of my remaining hols.. so ytd went for ktv.. haha was really fun but the place was smokey and not veri condusive.. but still cheaper than kbox. today was quite tired after church so came back to nap first, which now i wish i shudnt have.. but lol. sunday afternoons are nice to sleep. went for shawny's sermon, then went out for dinner, irvin, shawn, nick and me. talked about lots of things like how time flies and pple go away to study, army, but i'm sure God will provide our youth with new people to keep the spirit going. i still have 1 1/2 more years so i shall make gd use of it :) God will make a way :) was looking at a 2003 dec camp pic.. and some faces that were there i dun see much anymore, but now there are many new faces in the youth so thats good. also talked about the many dubious *ahem* things that go on in the youth. lolol. at this age most of the youth still lack maturity.. when i was that age i still lacked it then.

yup this hols has given me lots of time to think and think and think and think, isTj.. haha. grown much both in mental and spiritual maturity so i hope this keeps up. also had much time to practice guitar. lolz. well sch is starting tml and the moment i start talking to pple the stress level will reach peak already.. dun even need to wait for lessons.. haha cos just need to learn how much others have been doing during hols stress liao.. but nvm. still wanted to spend the last of my hols with church youths and recovering my introverted energy b4 going back to sch. the next 3 wks will be a challenge but i shall keep work constant (and guitar too i hope) and try to maintain my results quality even tho i noe it wud have slipped a bit and also try to keep the spirit joyful.

cya.

2006-06-17T15:57:00.000+08:00

well its that time of the year again. only comes twice. or perhaps three now with the new sch systems.

i wudnt really consider there to be much hols left already.. even though theres still 1 wk between me and term 3.

please excuse me these 4 wks from now till the end of my exams. sometimes revision just turns me into a lifeless boring being, deriving somewhat weird satisfaction from covering work revised.

hmm but this time i'm still not gonna let up on the guit prac like last time.. and 4 weeks does seem like a long time.. but its onli 2 and a half to the first paper. enough time to go ktv? lolol. so not used to this.

k then.. until another provoking situation or thought pokes into my life. cya.

2006-06-14T23:16:00.000+08:00

i told myself that i will make this blog post and i will.

just came back from chia lynn's farewell dinner at pasta fresca.. was a blast. haha i think chia lynn got the most gifts she ever got in her life and the other thing i remember was douglas snapping a lot a lot of photos. hahahah.

yeap even tho i thot i'd nvr say this.. but we will all miss chia lynn (1.. 2.. 3.. AWWWW. lol.) with all that crazy laughter, crazy jokes, weird stories, weird gadgets, weird outfits, and who noes what (lol), the youth group and care team would never quite be the same again.

yup.. u said that there isnt any church in vietnam, but do read the bible you bought, and remember that God is omnipresent, and that we here in singapore will also be here to support you!! will be praying for you too :)

hope u like the blues clues cd i got ya too ;) lolol. can go laugh urself silly watching it.

2006-06-11T22:23:00.000+08:00

ok i shall attempt to remember what happened during the camp and try to blog everything down.. b4 i forget haha.

day 1.
woke up at wad.. 6:30+??? yawnnnn. went to church and kinda stoned a bit.. was pretty stoney on the bus too. they sorta renovated yong peng.. so its now slightly cleaner but with less flies. but the stuff there costs more too. had to wait quite a while for keys when we reached there. was rooming with isaac tng and nicholas siew.. isaac is one crazy guy man. brought his friend's psp along so he was forever late if i didnt chase him cos he just wanted to play.. -shakes head- haha but nicholas was better. woke up immediately when my handphone alarm rang (maybe it was just really loud.. lol)

ok ice breakers.. four tribes.. then group mascot and group name time. after brainstorming and producing four other names that included 'care bears', our group decided on Keepers Of The Light instead, to tie in with our group song, shine Jesus shine and Matt. 5:16. our mascot was a drawing of a pyron-style hand (the fire guy in x-men).

dinner.. where we all tried to sit together as a group.. like 16 pple at a table? lololol. then we put up the aggies singing skit for the adults. first devotion for that night was by uncle winston.. remember it was really powerful.. that God has a purpose for everything we do or wherever we are. and hearing the story of how God brought him to church was just amazing. first lesson was an intro where kelvin talked about the parable of the fig tree and how we should all bear fruit. aft tt slept at 1130pm.

day 2.
alarm clock rings at 535am. like.. whoaaa. but still got energy!! everyone was down kinda on time for the 'surprise activity' in white t-shirts and black shorts.. to find themselves enlisted in training for the Lord's army. haha. despite getting bitten by many many mosquitoes (bzzz..) well i noe that it was really fun and all but army is gonna be nothing like it.. haha.

lesson 2.. moses with 'it cant be me'. about how we often make excuses to God not to use our gifts to serve God. then lesson 3: joseph with 'it could be me'. this was one of the most relevant lessons cos a lot of us are at a stage where we are not sure what God has in stall for us.. but we still trust in God to use us for his purposes.

afternoon games were a blastttttttttttttt!!!! i think it was a really good first time that we organised rotational station games cos it got everybody involved. there was funny water games like just answering questions to splash each other (sorry gareth!! lolol), water bombing, captains ball with a tomato (ewwwwwwwwww) weird treasure hunt game, and andrea jumps, andrea kills. haha.

sopping wet, decided to eat dinner b4 bathing. lesson 4 was on 'its gonna be me', with reference to David.. was slightly harder to relate to. yeap.

slept at 12.

day 3.
woke up at 545. arrgghhh. lol. but still can. prayer walk was quite good. i think it was just right for a first prayer walk for some. despite the mosquitoes (bzzzzt.) last lesson was on 'its not about me' and how pride might take over us when we are 'up there'. that is probably why God gave us weaknesses, as stated in 2 cor 12:9. aldous and raj shared their testimonies aft tt.. and aldous testimony was really really touching.. he has really been there, done that, drugs, temptations, everything. how he was called to serve in full time ministry is truly amazing. he realised that money isnt everything and.. what i gathered is that God has really called him to His purpose. raj also shared his work and his special sms ministry and involvement in singing. he sings great!! aft that was uncle lee hock's workshop, which i think could have been much better if we had more time.

afternoon, the adults pangsehed the telematch (boo!!) haha. was quite fun anyway especially with the funky big ball.

then at night, the skits!!!!! haha the highlight. well i cudnt really understand what was going on half the day for some of the skits.. but anyway it was quite funny. especially the x-men by shawn's group!! haha. and our group won the skit segment!! woohoo!! which lead us to our final victory!! yay. our skit was about the scene in heaven when God plays back all our 'CCTV footage' and sees whether we used our gifts for him or not. haha the army, doctor and toilet scene were all funny. was ok that we dint really get any prize.. but the feeling of winning was great :))

stayed up to write letters to as many pple as possible.. some went to watch world cup and stuff.. but none of us facilitators cud stay beyond 3 haha.. all too tireddddd. i slept at 3am. buay tahan. growing old haha.

anyways, i think this camp was one of the best camps, since two years ago when i was sec 3, the camp in june. yeap but was discussing with irvin, after attending so many camps sometimes we just feel that we cant get the old 'feeling' of past camps.. maybe cos we're growing old or what (hey i'm still 17.. lol) but i find its getting slightly harder to connect cos i dun play dota or soccer or what dunno what younger guys are chasing after nowadays. but still we are all united in Christ, so thats something we all have in common. and i dun mind playing those weird weird games now and then. lolz.

yup thats all i can remember for now.. its getting late!! i shud sleep soon. kk cya!!

2006-06-10T16:14:00.000+08:00

back from youth camp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this year was DEFINITELY a blast. even tho it was tightly crammed and all.. but i think it was still really fruitful. God blessed me with a good group, we had good games, good singing, good food, good skits... everything was really great.

yeap this camp i had to really get out of my comfort zone.. but prayer really helps.. was praying for my group everyday for 1 wk b4 the camp... and my group turned out to be really great.. and we won best skits!! that helped us win best group score too!! haha.. go KOTL!!

lol i'm having 'withdrawal symptoms' already.. i'm glad to see my guitar again.. but i'm too tired to play it. haha but i wudnt mind sacrificing guitar to have a never-ending youth camp... hahaha. well during the camp i slept for around what.. less than 14 hours.. so i got a slight headache now.. my mind still wants youth camp to go on.. but its ended.. and so has my supply of energy. haha.. i need to sleep.

ok thats all for now.. may blog more at a later date. cya!!

2006-06-06T15:22:00.000+08:00

leaving for youth camp tml!!! its gonna be a blast. even tho this is the first camp in a long time that i know completely nothing about the games.. perhaps it adds to the suspense.. lolol.

the past wk of the hols have been quite fruitful for me i guess.. been filling my life with lots and lots of music.. even tho my homework may not be complete.. but i've enjoyed being alone with God, and my music for this wk. now its off to youth camp to totally get away from everything!! leaving my guitar behind too.. shall not let it distract me during this camp haha.

2006-06-02T23:49:00.000+08:00

today the one of the filipino youth preachers arrived in singapore!! his name is raj, hope u all take the opportunity to get to know him better. hes a really nice person, altho a bit quiet, and u'll never guess his age. haha. came back from the aggies' concert just a while ago and it was great fun.

took a 2 1/2h nap in the afternoon so that means i'm gonna be sleeping late lol. going to carry on work with my 2nd music composition. like the way its going :))

gdnite!!

2006-06-01T10:30:00.000+08:00

phew my fingers are pooped. even if i spaced out my guitar practice like 1h in the morning and 1h in the evening.. maybe it doesnt really work haha. ive been trying that for the past 3 days and mannn.. today i cant even type properly anymore. haha. its time to give my fingers a break and do some other homework.

5 more days to youth camp!!

haha. cya.

2006-05-27T07:27:00.000+08:00

hey. finally the holidays are here.

its time to get away from unbearable school for a while and obtain some spiritual renewal, and new direction of life.

looking forward to youth camp :)

2006-05-25T20:42:00.000+08:00

hey.

havent updated for some time.. well i have been having many thoughts about music and its place in my life. well the case is that i'm going to take the ATCL exam (trinity college 1st level diploma) at the end of this year, and about a week ago my guitar teacher told me, after hearing one of my exam pieces, that the LTCL (trinity college 2nd level diploma) would be within my reach if i prioritised for the middle of next year. quite an encouragement to me.. cos even my teacher doesnt have the 2nd level dip.

but then again my music in sch has been taking a downturn. i havent topped a single test or assignment this term.. and failed the one i got back today. like the onli test i failed this term? and it was my fault and.. its really disappointing. and also once again, the mep scholarship which i dint get. all these signs seem to point away from my future in music.

i'm really confused about how much weight i should give to this subject and how much time i shud spend on it.. cos what if God's purpose for me isnt in a career for music? which seems to be the case now. perhaps i shud just listen to my mum, (my grandma), and my results. i just dunno.

anyway, was telling nick ytd that the thing circumstances cannot kill is passion.. and i do hope this passion can continue burning.. even tho it may not take the form of a career in music which for me now is still difficult to accept.

i need to trust in God. i feel so tired.. thats why i just cant wait for the hols. i feel so stubborn too.

Matthew 6:33: But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well...

maybe some demoralisation here and there is good for u. gdnite.

2006-05-20T20:59:00.000+08:00

hey.

news is out.. and i did not get the mep scholarship.. needless to say i'm disappointed cos i wanted it so badly.. but then again God did grant me the pre-u scholarship which is still quite an achievement, so praise God. i'm also happy for my friend yingda who got the scholarship. haha i met him at holland v ytd when i was on my way to catch a concert and i was rushing late.. then he broke the news to me he received just a few minutes before he saw me. ahh well mixed feelings. it wud have been nice if we got the scholarship together tho.. but they onli give 5 a year. and there were a heck lot of other strong competitors. yeap. well anyway i trust in God's purpose.. even tho his will may not be for me to hold a career in the future.. i will still have that passion for guitar and music. sometimes i wonder if our dreams sometimes clashes with God's purpose for us in our life.. and then when we dun succeed in pursuing our dreams we get all dissapointed.. but i guess thats part and parcel of life. ultimately God's purpose is still the most important for us.

2006-05-16T18:21:00.000+08:00

today was a really great day!!

had mep scholarship interview today.. i think it went quite ok. went with 3 others from my sch to the moe hq at buona vista. on the way saw a terrible accident.. there was like a pool (or rather a puddle) of blood on the road.. eww gross.

anyways, i think the interview went quite well.. my interviewers were mostly humanities people and they were really nice and funny. got some weird questions as well as some questions about music. but i guess they really do see my passion for guitar, no faking needed. some questions were what the new students (girls) were like, some stuff about cca, whether i wud choose between this scholarship and another if i was awarded both, stuff about guitar repertoire and my pieces, whether i had tuition (!!), how i coped with my studies, etc. and i also included a funny comment in one of my answers lolol.

saw some rjc pple there and i asked them if they took physics and they said yes.. and i asked them do they noe mrs tan woon ching.. and i asked them if she was nice and they said yes. aft tt i told them she was my mum and they were so surprised. lolol.

but of cos.. was looking forward most to seeing my old fren, yingda. he chose to go to acjc and is taking music there too. our friendship has definitely been strengthened more today.. cos even tho we're in different schools and stuff its really cool that when we both applied for the mep scholarship by some crazy chance my interview was right after his. so we met a lot earlier to talk and get ourselves ready for the interview. great friend.

yeap anyways thats all for today.. going for irvin's concert later. cya.

2006-05-14T17:31:00.000+08:00

heyy.

just returned back from batam after a wkend retreat with some of the church youth. had great fun there, and my spiritual walk is definitely renewed. did lots of fun stuff there like table tennis, taboo, canoeing.. and also had a lot of good food. but best of all was the sharing. the outpouring of hearts.

still feel a little groggy now.. almost as if i havent gotten off the ferry yet lol. brain still rocking. 2 more wks to june hols!! and that means 3 wks to church camp!!! haha cant wait. to get away from school for an extended period of time to have fun with u all. yeap. now back to being groggy.

2006-05-06T22:21:00.000+08:00

hmm i havent posted anything interesting here for a long while. so heres some interesting stuff i read in the readers' digest magazine, article on Life's 25 toughest questions Answered!

1. Can love really last a lifetime?
Absolutely - but only if you churck the fairy tale of living happily ever after. A team of scientists recently found that romantic love involves chemical changes in the brain that last 12 - 18 months. After that, you and your partner are on ur own.

11. Can a man and a woman ever just be friends?
For a short time perhaps. Making the friendship last requires that you find each other at least vaguely repulsive. Good luck!!

hahahah. i guess that sorta answer's one of my sch friend's question about whether i though a platonic friendship can really exist. yup just two of the more interesting questions from the article. the rest is too long to type out.

once again, bgr always seems so complicated, but im starting to understand just a bit more.. now i kinda understand why the past years' events happened as they did. but of cos new knowledge just brings more questions. well.. thats why im just happy talking to my guy friends in sch a lot onli.. after all i can crap whatever around them and they wont mind. and i've sorta agreed with myself that talking for more than 5 mins a day with a member of teh opposite gender is a really long time. and it is!! altho it sounds reall funny haha.

sch. is so weird. i need another holiday, and less tests. a long longg holiday.

2006-05-03T17:46:00.000+08:00

woah!! its been a longggggg time.

back from china for a few days already. well i have to say that it has been a really meaningful experience, but at the same time im really glad to be back, cos my skin was so dry, and i felt like i was drifting away from God. and not to mention my guitar skills dropped a heck lot too. if u want to read a report u can go to my sch blog.. but its really long so i think u all can just take a look at the pics.

sunday was teaching the rowdy p4 class again.. then at nite had youth song and word. quite good.. well done. monday had advance. quite a small gathering of youth onli. cant wait for camp!!

back to sch again ytd was quite ok.. but today it was starting to get tiring again. all the homework flooding in after the week long trip. sigh. hope i can cope!! all the best to all those of u taking ur exams now or soon!! stop reading my blog and go study!! lolol. kidding.

2006-04-21T17:07:00.000+08:00

heyy. its been a long time since i updated.

this wk sch has been quite eventful. many many challenges. and in a few hours time i will be flying to lijiang!! for those of u who are wondering which obscure corner of the world that place is from, its in china. we have to be at the airport at 1am (!) and our flight leaves at 3am (!!!). well im quite excited about the trip.. cos the time there will be spent with a big group of my last year classmates who are all introverts and whom i have forged ultra strong bonds with over the past 2 yrs.

i actually wanted to take a long long longggg afternoon nap today to prepare myself for tonite.. but today is like the perfect day NOT for an afternoon nap!! haha. a perfect day wud be one thats overcast and cold and rainy. mmmmm. but its all sunny and un-overcast now. haha.

yeap tts abt all i have to say.. pls keep me in ur prayers. im bringing my bible there!! cos "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path"!! will be missing u all this sunday and nxt friday =( but will be back nxt sunday!! and the following monday is also a pub hol: church advance!!

2006-04-16T22:23:00.000+08:00

heyy.

today p4 class wasnt that bad. haha. many factors i guess.
1. i made them sit on chairs. instead of the floor
2. cheryl decided to sit in.. factor in helping the class keep quiet or not? hmmm
3. one of the more restless kids dint come today.. when a naughty boy is on his own he cant cause as much trouble.. lol.
4. aunty waileng came to sit in later as well.

yeap. so i gave the class their well deserved sweets in exchange for some answers.

term 2 is 40% through!! church camp suddenly seems so near lol. cant wait. some of the most magical things happen during camps. reviewing through all the memories sure gets me excited.

ahh well.. its onli 7 more weeks away. haha. gdnite

2006-04-11T21:07:00.000+08:00

whoops im long overdue for an update.

sch has been really tiring. or maybe its just becos i dun have enuf sleep at nite. or both. they shud start sch at like.. 8:30 lah. lol. it wud optimise learning by.. a lot. haha. this wk has been quite ok so far i guess.. havent collapsed yet haha. and im going to china nxt wk already!! thats really fast. leaving on 22nd, coming back on 28th. yeap. going to lijiang for sch's overseas education programme.

p4 class on sunday was absolutely crazy man. looking at the whole situation, it seemed like how my chinese teacher tries to control my class. lol. some of them cant even keep 10 seconds of silence. must think of some way to make them sit still.. or else the noisy ones wud be distracting those who are willing to learn. hahah cheryl soh be prepared!!

a lot of funny things have been going on lately.. had a chat wif a fren who is in acjc now.. and he says that gossiping and scandals is part and parcel of jc life. hahah i guess its true to some extent.. but ultimately i think its really childish and i refuse to take part in any of it. which also leads me to another point of thought.. are platonic relationships really possible? hahah one of my frens was asking me that and im really starting to doubt its possibility. but then again.. it would be nice to have a platonic friendship.. wouldn't it? haha.

okay then.. its back to slacking for me. cya all on friday!! holiday!! haha.

2006-04-05T21:48:00.000+08:00

im teaching p4 class this sunday.

was just looking thru the teaching outlines and stuff on the bus just now.. and just read an email aunty june sent me concerning the class. hahahahaha i tell u.... like kids dun mug in sch enuf liao....

some interesting details:
1. memory verse is exodus 2:24 - 25
God heard their groaning and he remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac and with Jacob. So God looked on the Israelites and was concerned about them.

2. supplementary work: the class is memorising the books of the old testament and they are up to amos (!!!) now. lol how many of us even noe how many books there are in the bible.
3. and got points system some more to redeem stuff
4. ha and did i mention worksheets

like whoaaaaa man...... bible class has become like....... lol. looks like i have some work (and lots of memorising) to do before teaching the class this sunday. hahah i think rite, for church camp, we can just have some games that involve bible knowledge, and the JBC kids could well pwn (dota term) us to some extent haha. im both excited, and at the same time, filled with anticipation. gonna be one interesting experience.

2006-03-31T22:10:00.000+08:00

hey.

i'm so glad its the weekend and i can finally rest!! woohoo. last wkend wasnt much of a wkend anyway. and i so want to SLEEP. haha. this wk has been quite tough for me.. cos im not really at the peak of my health yet and i've basically just been drifiting along in terms of schwork and sch.

was feeling quite down becos of many reasons until just now in church. there is just something about church activities and church friends that is able to pull me up from the dumps if i am willing to be. the lesson was on heart connecting, and i was thinking that i cudnt really relate to the topic.. cos i felt i had been basically failing trying to connect to pple in sch this wk. but some of the lesson's main points were indeed very true. we cant just take a bible and walk down the street waving it around to change pples lives.. we have to write it on our hearts so that pple will be able to read it from our lives. also, i feel that its when we give of ourselves to others the most sincerely and wholeheartedly is when we may be the most vulnerable, but is the time when we strengthen friendships and relationships the most.

yeap. tts all.. cya =)

2006-03-28T20:34:00.000+08:00

i told myself that i wud make a blog entry tonite and i shall.. partly cos i dun feel like doing any work like my philosophy reflections.

i've said this once and i will say it again.. u dont realise how important or how strong a friendship is until the person is not around anymore. it is the case with my sch frens who left acsi for acjc.

but they're still in singapore.

a dear sister in christ will be leaving tml for japan. to me, goodbyes are not a sad thing, cos we know that we will see each other again no matter what. recently this year a friend left for australia to study and i tried to be happy at the airport. and it wasnt so bad. i hope tml the farewell will be a joyful one =)

i guess we at pp will really miss the warmth and encouragement candice brings to the youth. it is really a gift to be able to say 'come join our circle' to play a game to a new person so easily. for me it wud take a great deal of courage and nerve. we at pp will have to exemplify the examples shown to us to connect people, and to get out of our comfort zones and start to connect to others in the youth, especially during camps as that is where we bond the most, and also during the school term where some of us may be the most vulnerable.

anyways, candice, if u are reading this, i wish u all the best for your studies in japan and be a shining light to the people there!! always trust in God and do not forget your family here in Singapore!

2006-03-23T19:28:00.000+08:00

spent today at home. on a long awaited mc. hahah.

it really feels good to slow down (or rather completely stop) during a hard and fast crazy period of school.

just let ur brain disconnect from ur body.. and let both rest.

zzzzz..

hmm ytd i realised that we shud focus on what is eternal and not what is temporal. i knew that all along.. but just.. sorta forgot abt it. sigh. the demands of the world have finally taken its toll on me. so many deadlines, so much homework... the world just cudnt help but collapse. and the stress other pple pile on u. hmm.

hahah sometimes we always sing songs about heaven so much.. but i always wondered where the verses were that spoke about heaven. yeap but i found two passages last nite.. Matt. 6:19 onwards and 1 Peter 1. they dun describe much about heaven but they remind you that there is something beyond this life. hmm maybe this can be my sermon topic!! hahah but thats in july or august.

yeap. kinda brain dead so cant blog tt much now. cya